vrijdag 30 november 2018

It's been a while

Hello everyone, it's been a while. Can't remember when it was last, eh. It must have been over a year. But truth be told, if you want to know more about me, you can find everything on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Google +, Pinterest, and what have you not. It's been an interesting few months, if I'm completely honest.

I've had surgery. No, not plastic surgery (I am too darn beautiful, don't need that), but quite the surgery needed. I've had back pains for many years, and according to the specialists the main cause could have been kidney problems. Yeah, don't ask me the complete story, but it's been a journey for 2 1/2 years. Going to the hospital over and over again, scan here and scan there, blood tests over and over, urine samples (they've got so many samples, I think I peed at least 50 liters over the years), and several minor surgeries. Including one unexpected one.

My cysts did occur after drainage of them, so that didn't work. Beginning of September it all went wrong: acute kidney issues lead up to me being transported in an ambulance to the hospital. I was unable to do the most simple tasks like breathing or sitting still. I was not in a good mode, I was in a terrible state. I had to have help, otherwise it would and could have lead to something much more unpleasant. And the specialists response was 'nephrostomy'. This is basically a tube that goes straight into your kidney to the outside, and attached to it was a urine bag. Just to take the pressure of the kidney.For 8 to 9 weeks I had this bag attached to me.

It wasn't pleasant. I can assure you that. I know exactly how unpleasant it was. But it saved me. I could not have survived my pain and agony. But this pushed me towards the big surgery: pyleoplasty. The dreaded surgery. This meant that they would take of a small fraction of the kidney, which caused the obstruction. This surgery took place 2 weeks ago, and can you Adam and Eve it: I'm already on the mends. I'm sitting here, eating and drinking normally, already drove my car yesterday, and on Monday I will be working again. Time does fly by.

Hospital was not the best place for me to be in. Experienced a lot of unpleasant things. Woke up after the surgery with a catheter in, which I wasn't told of. And a bag on the left side to catch blood. And I am allergic to gauze/plasters called Centripore. Had blisters as a result. After being discharged on a Tuesday we had to go back on the Thursday because the blisters made movement extremely and utterly unpleasant. And now I'm scarred for life. Ah heck, if that's all, eh?

What I'm trying to say to you, the reader, is that you always should take care of yourself. Health comes first. Yes, I would not have gone this route, but I'm positive that the pyleoplasty was the right thing for hydronephrosis. All the other things were consequential and unnecessary, but part of the process. Always listen to your body, ALWAYS. Do not underestimate pain and agony.

If you are told you need a urinary bag, be a man (or woman) and accept it. It is unpleasant, trust me, but the end result can be a life without agony, and constant pain. Doctors will do their best to help you, not always in the quickest way, but still: your health is their focus. They don't focus on yourself, but only on the cause and correction. Never the patient.

I have had 2 1/2 years full of memories I will try to avoid. In about 4 months my sickness period comes to an end, if everything went accordingly to plan. If I have reached that moment, I will and must move on, and think of a brighter future. You can learn from moments like these, but you need to experience them first. Listen to your body, and let it all come over you. Do not resist. This will only cause you more unpleasant moments.

Now I'm sitting behind my laptop, vaping like an idiot (like everyone else sees me), and enjoying life. I am happy to have followed everything. It took a while, but I'm on the mend. I'm getting there. Life is smiling at me. And Hayley of course. We had to postpone our holidays now three times due to my sick bed. But 2019 will be our year. You must believe me, I do believe me.

Talk to you soon!

Martin

maandag 10 juli 2017

A Dutchman living in the UK

Well, it's been over a year since I last wrote something on here. I'm too busy, working full-time and keeping my TCD review website afloat. It's not easy to be fair, because I still do this as a hobby and make literally f**k all out of it. But I do it because I love the music, and love to share my passion.

My life in the UK. Pff, where do I start? This has been an incredible journey so far. To many it might come across as a normal and not exciting thing to do, but you can not be more wrong. This has been really difficult from time to time. First getting a job in the UK whilst still living in the Netherlands. That took me a few years to achieve, but thankfully I managed to find a job. The journey over? That must have been easy peasy? Well, yeah. The journey. Not the actual hassle that comes with it.

My flat had to be emptied, and that's when you find out you've got way too much stuff in your already small flat. At first glance you don't notice at all, but once you start clearing and cleaning stuff you do have bits and bobs everywhere. The tip, they were very happy with me. My old junk must have pleased them. But that wasn't all. Making sure everything would fit in boxes, and to rent a van. That was a hassle and a half! Also putting it in a van, that wasn't easy. I've dislocated my shoulder many times and had surgery done to it. So picking heavy items up, that has to be done with care. I'm not the Rock.

Renting a van? Done. Packing the van with pops? Also done. Driving to London from Kerkrade? Okay, not a big thing. But at Calais things went wrong: we drove into the section where the trucks are, and because we thought we had to be there, to get through security was a ball ache. Let's not mention the fact that truckers were pressing their horn constantly.To them I say f**k off. We've never done it before like this, and like you haven't made mistakes in your life?

Unpacking? Wow, that took a while. I think we lived with boxes for a few months. Even putting the bed and the sofa back together wasn't easy (thank God I was still at that time in the Netherlands, making sure everything was left behind correctly. Also saying goodbye to the family. That's never a nice thing to do, but at least they were pleased.

Once I started living in the UK I had to sort out a few things. First of all, a National Insurance Number. Many had adviced me that this was not the easiest thing to do, but to me it was okay. The woman who served me did her work properly, and only a week or 2 later I received mine in the post. Setting up a bank account? Check. Making sure I've got a doctor and a dentist? Check.

Work! Let's not forget about that. I started back in May back in 2016, and I still work here with a lot of fun and pleasure. I've met so many new people, made new friends, and the knowledge I've gained is tremendous. If I show you what I do on a daily basis, you wouldn't believe it. I work as a dealer assistant advisor/consultant for General Motors/Opel/Vauxhall. And that I do well. If I was crap, they would have sacked me. But I'm not, and now I am the one who maintains the whole of the Netherlands. Not today, but from tomorrow on I will do it again.

Why not today? Because I'm regaining my strength after surgery. Surgery? Yes, kidney surgery. Throughout 2016 I've visited the hospital and my GP several times, due to blood amongst my urine. Or shall I say urine amongst my blood? That wasn't good, and it turned out that I didn't have cancer (that's a bonus) but there were some issues with my kidney. So they planned in an operation for the 7th of July, which was last Friday. It wasn't pleasant but well needed. It's not like they've openend me up like a tin of spam, but it felt like it.

But not only have we done that, but also bought a foreign car. Well, it's foreign to me. A nice Mazda 2, and yeah, it's an old people's car, but do I care? It takes me from a to b, and I'm dry. Do we need and expect anything else from a vehicle? I don't need all those extras, I'm pleased with the basics.

Every day I feel less Dutch, and many things I normally have craved for, are slowely going down the drain. Even the language I sometimes struggle with. English is now my main language, and I maintain my Dutch language by speaking to my colleagues at work. But I feel now more at home in this country with my missus and her family, and our friends. We've experienced a lot, and we are still happy together. Some have said that this might not work out, but we proved them wrong.

The only thing I miss is the Dutch chippy. If you don't know what I mean by that, don't comment. It's the best thing God has ever created. Yes, I do eat British food, but some things aren't the same. Why are the chips soggy and not thin and crispy? Why haven't you got frikandels or spoetniks or anything you can get from a chippy? Bitterballen? Kroket? Yep, I miss the greasy food.

And of course my family. Friends? I didn't have many friends, they were mainly work colleagues. But only a handful keep in touch with me and visa versa. The majority move on, and so should I. I am not coming back to the Netherlands, my heart lies here. Yes, I've still got the Dutch nationality, but give me around 3 1/2 years and I will get the British citizenship. Yes, I will do the test. Even though it's not even interesting (I don't know who was the 4th King of England, or who was beheaded, or when the British armada went to Spain and killed many). I will do the test, and pass.

This is the country I should have been born in. But it's never to late to accept reality. I wasn't born here, wasn't educated here, and I wasn't raised here, but I'm going to live here now and die here. My heart beats whenever I speak in English a tad faster, and I roar like the three lions. Or are they leopards?

I'm signing off now. Got other things to do. Mainly relax. Hopefully it won't be another year before I write another ridicilous blog.

Ps. yes, I might be Dutch, but I don't stick a finger in a dike, wear wooden shoes, love tulips, or live in a windmill. Accept that. Thank you.

Martin a.k.a. The Crazy Dutchman

donderdag 4 augustus 2016

My Life In The UK

I've been in this country for several months, and I have to say that it's been a game changing decision I've made. It was terrifying, giving up everything I had in the Netherlands, but I had to make a decision, staying over there and be separated from my girl, or just make the move. At the beginning of the year I wasn't sure it was going to be a good year, but it turned out to be awesome!

I was given the opportunity to work for GM as a dealer assistant in Luton, and I took it with both hands. I've been working there since the 7th of March, and I've met so many nice people! In all honesty I can say that I have had fun since the day I started there, met so many nice people. My colleagues are all nice, and the job is actually quite nice. The decision I made was the right one!

Experienced a lot in those months. Had my first car crash, ruined the front side of my vehicle, and it made me feel gutted. I've always been very careful with my car, cleaned it every week, always kept to the speed limit, never did anything stupid with it, and now I've made the mistake that cost me my front side of the car. Well, there has to be a first for everything.

Also I went raving in Bournemouth. It had been a while since I last raved the night away. I met so many nice people, and it made me realise that I'm in the right place. I should have made this decision years ago. I was too afraid, anxious, but now I'm here (just in time, months before the Brexit). And I'm not leaving. I pay my taxes, I work hard, I support this country as much as I can. And I don't have a criminal record. Why would you send me back?

Well, it's been a while since I last typed a blog, I should do this more often. This is the first of many, I reckon.


zaterdag 12 december 2015

Not being able to....

work on my other website. It's dull, writing a blog here. What to put down? What's relevant for me to typ here? I don't have a clue. My thoughts? You seriously don't want to hear my thoughts.

On my other website (which is http://www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl/wp ) I write reviews. Music reviews, and it's been going well. I've been doing it for a couple of years, and the response has been great. It's a lot of fun, reviewing music. But the most rewarding thing is the response from well known names in the music industry.
Also the free CDs/mixes they do sent to me. Often I know in advance I will be getting a nice surprise in my mailbox, but sometimes it comes as a surprise. Some artists do send me their whole back catalogue, and you always have greedy people reading those reviews and sending me mails about me sharing this with them (all for free). My answer? Buy the album(s) yourself, you greedy plonker. Start your own website, and do work for it.

Sadly I haven't been able to write any reviews the last couple of days, due to an error I keep getting when I try to log in. The error can not be solved from my end, because I do not have the rights to alter/change anything in Wordpress, I'm just a moderator, someone who writes blogs. If I do have questions I have to e-mail to my webpage builder, which is CMSDesigns.nl ,and they help me out a lot. But until they've contacted the webhost, there's nothing I can do.

Please be patient. I will be back with many new reviews. Hopefully I can go onto my website today, or maybe tomorrow morning. Damn.

vrijdag 11 december 2015

Getting Work.... why is it so difficult?

As you may or may not know, I'm a 32 year old man. Yes, I am a man, I've checked it this morning. I am Dutch, and I speak and write in two languages (English and Dutch), which might appear to be an advantage for me to find a job suitable for me in the UK. I've been on the hunt for a long time, and yet I am unsuccesful. It's devastating and quite frankly painful to be rejected each and every time, mainly because there are too many people applying for the same job. I always receive the same e-mail, in which it says that 'we are sorry bla bla bla.... unsuccesful bla bla'. How come? What made them think that I'm not the most capable person for this job? Just by looking at my CV? My CV is just a sheet of paper on which bits and bobs are written down, but if you give me a chance to explain who I am and what I'm capable of, this sheet of paper becomes useless.

Don't get me wrong, I have been to interviews, and came far, but sadly never hired. One of the jobs I've applied for had 30,000 people applying for it, so I didn't stand a chance. There were people who knew exactly what to expect during the whole business, and even the role play bit. I was not ready for a role play part, and I failed on that. Disappointed as I was, I never got the answer why I failed. But that didn't stop me from sending out e-mails, applying as much as I can. Every day I send my CV to so many people, and yet they always reply by sending a standard e-mail back.

Sometimes I do get a phone call, and I'm happy as a bunny. I always explain my situation, and the main reason why I want to move over to the UK. Not to claim any benefits or do anything illegal/stupid, but to work there, live there, pay my taxes, and basically become a UK citizen (in the future). My wife's British, born and raised in London, and we've been together for 7 years and a bit (don't ask me how long, I am a man). English has always been a second language to me, and I've been in love with everything British since the first time I came over for a holiday. I am in love, truly in love. I am willing to leave my family and friends behind, and start a new life in the UK. Yes, it is scary, but manageable (or however you spell it!).

I've had phone calls, e-mails, and when they do not respond or call at all after they've agreed to do an interview on the phone, it makes me wonder: is there any hope left? I've had phone calls with people who barely spoke any English at all, and I had to end the conversation due to the fact that I could not understand a single word. I speak English much better than most people do (who are from abroad, like I am), and yet it's not easy. Is it because I'm Dutch? What is it? Am I too polite?

I've been working for the last 14-15 years for the same employee, and not many people can say that in this day and age. Yes, I'm risking it all, but I know it's going to be worth it. If you are reading this and you are thinking of giving me a chance, you know what to do. Contact me or let me contact you. I have never been a disappointment at all, never been ill/sick and have no criminal record. Yes I have had speeding tickets in the past, but who hasn't? That's not criminal, isn't it?

I will find the perfect job suitable for me. No call centre stuff, because I'm already annoyed when people from call centres call me. But something else. I will find it. You just have to be patient enough with me, I will write rants on Facebook and Twitter about companies who do not contact me or reply anymore, without going into any details. I will remain nice and polite, but deep down inside I will be furious. Be kind and do not think I'm a horrible person, I am nice. But steam has to go somewhere, hasn't it?

Oh, if you want to know my personal strengths: I am the best employee you will ever encounter. One strength enough to last you a lifetime.




Christmas....

It's that time of the year again: Christmas is near. The world embraces the red and white colours to dominate everything, and everywhere you look there's this man with a huge beard and baggy clothing, demanding us to sing for him Christmas songs. Oh how jolly. Most people have big Christmas trees in their house, real or fake ones. If I'm brutally honest, I do like it, decorating the tree and the house. You take out the big boxes you've got hidden away from the world for 11 months and blow off the dust, and take out everything and decorate it with passion. Thankfully I've got a lovely girlfriend who always helps me out, so decorating the tree is something we do together, and spending time together with the person you love is what we are after, aren't we?

But there's one side of Christmas I never understand at all! It's the media. The media goes absolutely bonkers months before Christmas, getting us all excited with stupid adds we don't want to see. And if it's not the media, it's the companies who benefit from this jolly festive season. Why only during this season can we get items with a discount? Why not throughout the whole year? Why pay so much more a day after Christmas when the item hasn't changed at all? And why is it always busy in shops when I go shopping? I dislike shopping a couple of days before, but I'm a man, so we do our shopping as late as we can, preferably the day itself. Busy days are not my cup of tea.

I do love shopping, and if I do go shopping, I spend minutes in a shop. Not hours like most females do. I use my four braincells and go chasing for the ultimate Christmas present. Promotional offers always hits you in the face, and even at the till you are bombarded with items you do not want to buy. The worst things are always sold during this season, and I have always wondered why 'willy-warmers' are a pleasant thing to buy for anyone. Or stuff similar to it. There are actually companies who make crap, and during this festive season we are most likely to buy it. Why?

I won't buy anything for anyone if they don't need it. I've been warned months prior to Christmas what to buy (my girlfriend always gets excited in September), so I do know what to purchase. I love her excitement, she gets a sparkle in her eyes. So I buy as much as I can, and always hope I've bought more presents than anyone else, because it's a game, isn't it?

Christmas is also the time of the year when people start fabricating shite music, re-make old classic anthems and updating it to the present day. Why would you mutilate a Christmas classic? The originals are always better, and hearing a boyband sing 'White Christmas' only makes my hemmorroid bleed ferociously. But they still sell, and probably appear on the top position in the chart, and I always wonder how that's even possible?

From a Christmas tree in the living room to Christmas music in the car to having a Christmas wallpaper on your phone, this season is dominated by balls, trees and festive songs. Also food is an important thing: we in the Netherlands like to gourmet, and if you don't know what that is... it's much better than turkey, I garantee! Shoving things up a dead animals' bottom ain't pleasant to do or to look at, so let's skip the turkey this year and gourmet. Look it up if you want to know what it is!

Secretly, I do love Christmas. It might appear that I dislike it a lot, but secretly I do love it. There's an atmosphere I can not describe, and like my girlfriend I'm happy when I can play 'Driving Home For Christmas' by Chris Rea in September. Why? Because I can and want to. Yes, it's all about being together with your family and friends, and this year I will be working throughout the Christmas days, so not time for the family at all. After Christmas I will be spending time with my family, and spending time is important, but to me opening presents is the most important bit of it all!

I love my family throughout the year, but during Christmas there's only one thing I want to do: sit, eat, watch a film, open presents, see what kind of rubbish there is on television, and stuff my face with chocolate. Basically what I do every day of the year. So what's the difference? Presents. See, I told you presents are important. But let me warn you: no willy warmers, or anything as idiotic as that.


donderdag 27 februari 2014

2014..... Milton Keynes

Yes, I do know it has been months since I last typed a message on here, but I was always busy updating my website (www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl) or just busy in general. I've been over to the U.K. many times, and I always had a great time. But seeing as my website is currently unavailable (due to an error, don't know what caused it), I've got plenty of time to typ a message on here, to keep those who read this nonsense updated. And especially my dad, seeing as he doesn't visit my new website, because he simply can't be bothered. Here's my story about my recent trip to the U.K.......

I've been waiting for this day to come for many weeks, and last Thursday it was the day of all days: I had booked a ticket via P&O and Thursday was the day the journey started. Yet there was a set back: I had to work a nightshift previous to the journey, and after working 8 hours, I was ready to drive, but knackered. My colleague arrived a bit earlier, so I could leave on time. The whole journey through Belgium and France was a doddle, on a few small traffic jams everything was fine. I was knackered, but the music kept me going through the morning. Originally I had the ferry around 11 o'clock, but I arrived way on time, so the original plan was to relax on the parking area, and maybe to catch some sleep. But the nice people at the check-in terminal were nice enough to book me on an earlier boat, so I didn't have any time at all to catch some sleep: I was probably the last person to board! Once on board, there were many annoying people who thought it was necessary to shout as loud as they could, and make themselves heard. You might call them 'cheese eating surrender monkeys', I call them 'ze french'. Thankfully I had my book and headphones with me, and a few buns, so I was occupied throughout the whole journey!

After reaching Dover, I assumed they wanted to search the car, but seeing as I was the last person, the custom officers couldn't be bothered, and they let me drive off without searching the car. I couldn't care if they did: I've got nothing to hide at all. I am a good civilian, no drugs or alcohol in my car. I did have a bag of Dutch snacks with me, for my mother-in-law, but it's not forbidden to take them with me to the U.K.? Anyway, I was prepared for a rough journey, seeing as the U.K. is having problems, caused by the weather. The wind and rain were heavy, but not as much as I've seen on the news. After 2 hours driving on the M25 and another road I simply can't remember the name of, I went to Barnet, to pick up my wife. She had worked already, and I agreed to pick her up. But for the love of God, the parking facilities are really poor in Barnet. After a horrible phone conversation with her, explaining where I should park, we met at the car park of Tobey's Carvery. I was a bit peckish, and she too, so we decided to eat something. The menu they gave us only had full meals, not sarnies or anything light, so we both decided to get sausage rolls instead. What a treat, you might think?! They were f**king horrible! The most horrible thing I've ever tasted, and it did upset both our stomaches! Sick as we were, we went home. After a well-deserved sleep, I simply can't remember what we did? I think we stayed at home, had a meal there, but I could be wrong. Oh no, we had a meal at home, and it included dumplings. Another nasty thing I didn't like. We had a stew (is that how you spell it?). It was nice, but the dumplings weren't made for me.

The next day we woke up, got ready for the journey to Milton Keynes, and after setting off, we filled the car with Diesel, to make sure we made the journey without having to walk a single feet. The journey was good, we stopped at a service station for some treats for uncle Martin and Caroline, and bought them some nice flowers in a basket. We made it in time, and we were welcomed by Caroline (Martin was still at work). After Martin got home, they all decided to take me to a restaurant. The ladies got ready (why does it always take hours for them to look good?) and we just sat there waiting for them. I wish I knew the name of the place, but I think it was next to a Hyundai dealer?! An American type of restaurant, with a huge gorilla next to the entry door. You know which one I'm talking about? The food was good, and I had chicken with chips. The chicken... well, the size was appalling. Three bites and the chicken was finished! I was still hungry after leaving the restaurant, and after a quick detour, the girls decided to go to Domino's to get me a pizza, my favourite: Texas BBQ. Once we made it back home, I ate the bloody pizza within minutes, and was still peckish after! A good night it was, and seeing as we were all tired, we went to bed. The next day was going to be a long one!

To prove my point, my wife has taken a picture of the chicken, judge my opinion if you like, but for me it was too small (she always makes pictures of food, don't know why?!) Oh, the name of the place was Buddies.


The next day we decided to go to Milton Keynes shopping centre, probably the biggest one I've ever seen! We went out around 10 to eat breakfast at our well trusted Wetherspoon, and we ate a full English breakfast (both Martins). The two girls had a sausage on a bun. Mmmm, nothing beats a full English Breakfast!


After this short stop, we walked around the shopping centre for hours. The girls seemed to like it, and even I had to admit that it was nice, yet you couldn't see the whole shopping centre in one day. We only walked the main path, not the sides at all. Many shops we've seen, a couple we've been in. We've been in Sports Direct, Doc Martins, Superdrug etc. I always go shoe shopping, because I'm after one specific type of shoe, and in other stores they normally don't have size 9 1/2. I've got weird feet, I know. And this might come as no surprise: we ate again, this time at Krispy Kremes. If I don't increase body wise by the end of the year, I might have the cure to stay slim forever! After munching away, we walked again for many hours. I do apologise for this picture: I forgot to bring my hair gel with me to Milton Keynes, and even though we bought a new one, I didn't find it appropriate to do my hair in a shopping centre. So my hair was held together by a female hair spray (thanks Caroline). And yes, I do look miserable, but every man on this planet will look the same if he goes shopping with a woman.


God, I look like a horse in this picture. After walking on the outside market, we went to Costco. What a huge place! If I would have lived in the U.K. already, I would have been shopping there, but to buy 150 rolls of toilet paper would be unnecessary for me right now. But they had so many things: after moving to the U.K., I must become a member and buy everything there, in case a war might occur! Oh, and I want a specific sofa! I think it was called 'Lazy Boy', but it was so nice, my bum agreed. Costco is cool, fact!


Anyway, after these dreadful yet intriguing hours, we decided to leave, seeing as Martin had a ice hockey game to go to (in Coventry), and it wasn't my cup of tea, even though he asked me to go with him. We (Caroline, Hayley and myself) went to the nearest pub for.... FOOD. After the lovely meal, the ladies had a strawberry woo woo, whatever that is. It had alcohol in it, and the conversations that followed, we had a great time, even though the subjects were a bit unusual (princess Diana, prince Charles, the bombing of London etc.). Not your usual subject. After we went to the nearest shop to buy Freddo's (I love them), we went home and started playing games, such as Monopoly, Triominos and The Catch. Is it called the Catch? Nope, it's called the Chase. And obviously, I won every game... even though we didn't finish Monopoly, because the girls didn't want to continue. I was a maniac, bought every property I could. Lol.



After Martin got home from his game, we played some more Triominos, and I won a game. Hayley won another, but Martin came really close. He's a good player, messes up other people's minds with his tactics.

We went to bed, and woke up, and had a cup of tea and a nice breakfast. We both had a wicked weekend in Milton Keynes, and I do love it down there. Martin had shown us all there is to see, and the best place has got to be the location where they make Aston Martins. Beautiful cars, one day I will own one.

The long journey to London was quickly done, not a lot of traffic on the road at all. After arriving home, we had a proper Sunday Lunch, with Yorkshire puddings. Nom nom nom, they are tasty! We decided to go to London centre, to buy some presents for my sister and brother-in-law, and my mother and father. It was busy, Hayley told me that there was a award ceremony that day, don't ask me which one. We went into Cool Britannia, shopped for hours (and even smelt someone's nasty fart), and got out with 2 bags filled with quirky things (Riana and Michel will know). You want proof that we walked around Piccadilly Circus? Here's proof!





We had enough, so we went home, walked passed the Polski Sklep (the turk shop), and we walked straight into Hayley's friend, Lisa. She kindly offered us a lift home, which was literally 2 minutes, but still, it was a nice gesture. We got home, we played board games, and watched things on television. Family Fortunes, with some bloke from McFly. He lost. Duh, obviously. It had been yet another long day, so we went to bed.

The weather during my stay was absolutely gorgeous. The sun was shining, no rain at all. Well, maybe a drizzle, but that was it. My last day we both decided to go to Enfield, to eat at TGI Fridays. We had a full meal, and it was lovely, yet we both knew that the end was near: I had to leave London around 3 o'clock, so there was no time to waste. I was sad, as you can tell, and so was Hayley.


After a long kiss and a long hug, I said goodbye to everyone, and left for Dover. The traffic wasn't so bad at all, the weather good. The drive was a doddle, quite boring to be honest. I got to Dover on time, yet I missed the previous boat, so I had to wait for the one I was originally booked for. And ofcourse the car got searched. Always me. A quick pee and a look around followed, and got back into the car. I got scared for a minute when I walked out of the Burger King, there was a police van, and no one else was inside, so I was guessing they were looking for me, but they weren't: they were peckish too!


After boarding, I made myself comfortable, and had a nice book to read, yet no headphones (they were lost at the time), so I could hear everyone shout and scream. And also one bloke who snored so loudly, people in Calais could hear him snore, even though we didn't set off at all! The journey was long, and after reaching Calais, the long drive home emerged in front of me. So boring, with cruise controle the journey become even more boring. Some idiot from Belgium started to annoy me, a chav in a BMW, who had the nerve to cut me off several times, and when I tried to pass him, he passed me again and cut me off again. With this going on, I missed the original exit, and had a small detour (20 minutes) which turned out to be an even shorter route to Kerkrade!? Weird ja? After stopping at a service station in Belgium for a tea and some fags, there wasn't much to talk about. I played music, drove home, and after filling up at my local petrol station, I gave the car a quick wash (at 1 in the morning).


Nearly 1300 kilometers I drove in those days, but it was fun. I don't want to make these journeys any more, I want to move over, so I don't need to travel this much to see my wife. That's future talk, but near future talk. But until then, journey's like this one will happen. And I'm happy, because I still like driving.

Thanks to my family-in-law for a brilliant long weekend. It's back to normal for me, and I hate that. U.K., I promise you, I'll be back soon. Boy, I miss the food a lot. I want to go to TGI Friday, Krispy Kreme, etc. I'm a fat f**ker.

I love you Hayley, thanks for a brilliant weekend. Standard as usual, but that's what I like. And I don't need anything else, this has been yet another good weekend. Thanks hun!

donderdag 21 februari 2013

It's been quite some time....

since I last wrote a blog. I have been living a busy life, which is weird, seeing as I do f**k all. I work fulltime at a petrol station in the Netherlands, yet I don't seem to have the time to do anything else, other than to sit behind the computer, and watch QI on repeat on Youtube. Ow yeah, and I do have a website where I review mixes, CDs and livesets. There isn't much interesting to share with you lot, and I doubt that anyone is still reading this, seeing as I haven't posted anything interesting for a long time. Let's see if I can write something interesting down.

I do lots of things online. I browse a lot, always looking for new mixes and livesets. I like to go onto Soundcloud and Mixcloud, yet Mixcloud is shite when you want to download a mix, you simply can't. And the music player is absolutely wank, it's nothing to boast about. They have done, trying to persuade us to vote for them being the best website of 2012. Well, clearly, they are not. Not saying Soundcloud is the best, but it's miles ahead. But again, times change, even on the internet, and the ongoing revolution is unstoppable: they tend to change everything from time to time: from lay-out to paying for things. Ridicilous. Some website's should not change at all, like Soundcloud. I've tried the new lay-out, yet I find it extremely unsatifying. I can't find anything, and I don't like the lay-out. It still has the option to choose between the old and the new lay-out, but one day we all have to adapt ourselves to the new page. Like Facebook. I am a Facebook freak, I go on it several hours daily, and I do find it's change rather irritating. Adds everywhere, it's not possible to scroll on Facebook without being hit in the face with advertisement. Back in the good old days, it was easy peasy, now it's just so damn hard. Because I lived in Heerlen once, and I've typed that amongst my personal info, doesn't mean I need to get information regarding films shown in Heerlen theatres, or where I can drink a pint in Heerlen. Useless toss. I hate ads, especially on Youtube, seeing as I spend most of my day on it. I don't want to buy things, I just want to see a video. F**k off with your nonsense, I will never wear those clothing items, nor will I buy them for my wife. And you always have to wait 5 seconds to continue, 5 whole seconds! What's the point in that? Within 5 seconds I get angrier and angrier, and there's no point I want to click on the add, I want to shove my computer up my arse! Annoying. And there's nothing you can do about it. Well, unless you get your creditcard out, and pay for NOT seeing adds.

The world is so unfair. We have to pay for NOT seeing things. Isn't that weird? It's the same with cars, the more expensive they get, the less they have. Look at those race monsters you see on Top Gear or Fifth Gear, absolutely beautiful cars, but when you drive a Porsche, they do take weight off the car to make it faster, yet you pay more money for it? Isn't that weird? One day we will have to pay for nothing, we might pay for breathing. Money has changed the surface of the Earth. Money does make you do absolutely horrible things, like commit a murder, or harm someone. What's the point? Shouldn't we all be happy about others? Shouldn't we all accept the fact that we are all different, with opinions and the amount of money on our bank account, and just live on? Money is dangerous. People don't understand how dangerous it is. Sometimes people say that they need money to live, and I am not backing that statement to a certain degree. I do think that people with disabilities need money, to get the best support they can get. And I think they need to be looked after. Yet to blame everything on a bad youth, because people were raised in a poor enviroment is just wrong. Kids are spoiled nowadays, walking around with an old Nokia phone is child abuse. Kids who don't have the latests games are so out of touch, and blame everything on being poor, but kids don't know what they have! They have got everything. When I was younger, I had an Atari, you know, a wooden one. But not when the Atari age happened, years after the game console period I got one. When Nokia's were cool at school, I was walking around with a shite phone, one with a huge antenna. I was known to be the uncoolest kid at school, and yes, I wasn't happy. But look where I am right now: I've got a fulltime job, I've got the love of my life, I am raised rather hard yet it made me look at the world the way we all should look at it, cherrish it. We all live on this planet, and yet the digital revolution has made us all individuals: arguments online harm us more than an actual argument face 2 face. We can not handle it when someone dislikes our video's posted on Youtube, we hate it when people comment negatively on our statusses, we are getting weaker and weaker each single day. Knowledge to live is quickly drained out of our bodies, we do tend to spend most time online, yet we do not learn a single thing. We tend to watch show where untalented people try to become rich and succesfull, and when they fail, we all laugh. We shouldn't laugh, we should not look at others failing: we have all been there. Yet humour has changed. And so have we.

Whenever we go online, or watch television, we are expected to get our wallet out, and wave around our money, so money grabbers can take it away from us. Happiness can be bought nowadays, yet I will not allow myself to follow that path, I will not buy a single thing online to improve my life. You know what can make you happier? Go out and sniff the air! Yes, I can understand it that you might think it's weird, me writing about going out, whilst sitting behind a computer. Yet it makes me the happiest man ever. If I want to achieve happiness, I go out with my wife to a restaurant or a bar. Or even a museum. Enjoy the past, present and the future. Why walk around with an umbrella 365 days of the year? Why not let the rain touch your face, and make you feel human again? Why not appreciate the things mother Nature has got to offer? Yes, I do agree, bugs are ugly, but appreciate it. Why be miserable all the time? You don't need a computer to achieve happiness, a nice board game can make you happier! I do love to play games with the wife, and I win all the time (no, I don't cheat, I just don't explain the rules properly). You could do the same with your loved one(s). Buy a board game, and have hours of fun. I see a lot of families who can not appreciate it anymore. The reason I don't have a game console, is because it's waste of money. I'd rather play a nice game with my wife, like Scrabble, Jenga, Triominos, or whatever game you prefer. Monopoly is good too, but you need time. And time isn't on our sides, is it?

Time can not be bought online, you dopey sods. Time is so beautiful, waiting for your loved one to arrive at an airport can feel like hours, yet the excitement is undescribable. You can not explain it, how it feels when you see people coming through those doors, yet it's not the one you are waiting for. And when she does come through the doors, happiness takes over everything. It does. Appreciate time, that's what I am saying. Yes, you can waste your time by typing a blog about bollocks (like I've done), and think to yourself "what have I done? I should have done other things", yet it's necessary. The longer I spend behind a computer, the less I will in the future. It's weird, isn't it? I do like sitting behind a computer, yet I typ less and less (just look at the amount of blogs I've typed). I start to live life the best way I can, by sharing my knowledge, and expand my knowlegde. I am a huge fan of knowlegde (to an extent), and I try to absorb as much as I can. And we should all do it!

It mesmerizing to read so many beautiful stories, about things happened in the past. But how many people nowadays read books? It's all Ipad this, Ibook that, Ireader, etc. The most annoying thing people do, is buy a book online, and read it on a digitial device. Why not buy the original, you dopey sod? I do like to read about anything and everything, yet sometimes it's just too damn hard to understand things, especially in a foreign language, like English. I do spend a lot of time online browsing English website, yet whenever I try to read Stephen Fry's book, I stumble. I can not continue without my brain hurting. I try, yet I fail. So the next thing to do, is read other things, expand your knowledge of the language and the subject, and then get back to it. Yes, I do know I mistyp words sometimes, and I make mistakes all the time. But I try. At least I try. And if I fail, I will. That's what makes us human. I think I'm born in the wrong century, I would loved it being born at the beginning of the 20th century, oh, I would have been such a cool person. But I am not. I am old of mind, my moral values are different compared to other members of my generation. I don't go to Spain to get absolutely hammered, I don't sit on the beach, wasting my summer. I do like it to be around company, especially my loved one. That's what makes me happy. And to go to museums. I love it. The smell, the taste (yes, that's a weird one). I could live without a computer, yet I can not live without a mobile phone. Isn't that weird?

I am living in a gap. A gap between the previous generation and the new age generation, the youngsters who live on this planet right now. I do appreciate technology and I find it fascinating, but I do know it does destroy our moral values. We are slowely turning into zombies. You think I am wrong? Just look at the reaction of the millions of people who couldn't use their Blackberries for a couple of days. People went mad! Absolutely mad. Technology is great, yet weird. I do love to read about the Apollo mission into space, yet I find Angry Birds dull and stupid. I do love the history behind a mobile phone interesting, yet playing a game console I find boring. I am weird, yes I know. I do have a weird opinion, and I do hope I did not offend anyone. But the thing I am trying to say is, to turn of your computer, and walk around. Look at what you have, and how much you own. And think of others on this planet who have ABSOLUTELY nothing. You feel rich, eh? Now expand that feeling, try to feel rich for 24 hours, and you are happy, even though you are not a millionaire. You are richer than you think. Live life as good as you can. And love life and those in it.

woensdag 26 september 2012

Martin & Hayley's Engagement Party

Yes, it's been a while, I haven't been on this page for ages..... but I think it's about time that I tell you what has happened on the first of September 2012.....

You all already know that I've asked Hayley to marry me, and she said yes, thankfully. Imagine if she said no! But she said yes, and I was a happy man. And as she is a woman, her mind went absolutely bonkers, she already thought of white birds, a white horse, her wedding dress etc. That's what the ladies do. Dangerous kind of humans they are. And whilest her brain went mental, so did I! She was talking about an engagement party, and I was unaware of such a thing: never have been to such a party, and I don't know anyone who ever held one. It's must have been an English thing, I think.

We both decided on a date, and we made the magic happen. And when I say magic, I mean Hayley doing all the work. I am quite lazy, and filled with no ideas, I only look at the money, and that's it. She had everything planned, she is a good girlfriend. And future wife to be, don't forget about that. But seeing as I wasn't in the UK, I couldn't organise the party with her, I had to trust her that she did the right thing. And she did. She had chosen the location, which was near to her house, and that ment I could drink a couple of pints. The only thing I was allowed to do (I don't mean it like that), was to get the invitation printed, and obviously designed. I went to my brother-in-law, who is a webdesigner, and he made a wicked invitation. Made a couple of these on photo paper, and sended them all around the UK! My job was done...... for now.

Hayley and I had to do alot. I had to take some Dutch food with me in the car, and for those who were wandering what it was: frikandels, bitterballen, bamiballen etc. Had around 300 snacks, and I delivered it to the house, where it was put in the freezer (I arrived days before the party, couldn't defrost them). I can talk about the most boring thing ever, but I'm not: it's not interesting to tell you how we put the snacks in the freezer.

On the 31st of August, my parents arrived from the Netherlands. After a long journey (I do that every time!) they got to the Premier Inn hotel, and immediately they tried to be English....... by hitting the pub, and staying there until the pub closed. We joined them later, and had a nice meal (seeing as it was my birthday). It was nice to see my  mum and dad in the country I am going to live in. Felt weird, but in a good way. 

The day emerged, and we were both a bit stressed. Hayley's barber was late, her uncle Martin was late, his daugther Caroline was too sick, so she couldn't come...... what a day it was. We decided to go to the location around 4:30 and decorate it. But all of a sudden, a few family members turned up at Hayley's house, and we weren't ready for that. We didn't knew what to do..... take them with us already, or just leave them there, and we would leave gran behind, so she could keep them company? We decided to leave gran there was the best thing to do, and we took off.

I decided to let Hayley walk around without her dress on, seeing as we would return to the house to pick up gran. No, she didn't walk around naked, don't be silly. We got to the venue, and immediatly encountered a problem: we needed more people to decorate the location! It was just the three of us, and we were rushing our arses off. I was carrying the tables, Hayley did the decoration, and mum blew up the balloons. Unorganised, but still managable. We worked hard, and forgot the time. After we had put the table and everthing ready(ish), we went home to pick up gran. Hayley got dressed and lovely make up on, and uncle Martin arrived. After causing mayhem in the house, we left, and arrived a few minutes after 6..... and we encountered a large group of people, waiting outside the venue.... waiting for US. OMG, I shat a brick. I am shy, always, and nothing can help me. I just embraced my fear, and shook hands, and we all went in. I went straight into the kitchen, to prepare the food (my family brought some Dutch pies with them, and someone had to cut them in slices). The caterer was nice, he left the food on the tables, he did a nice job. He did it when we were at the house, creating mayhem. Here, look:

It's uncle Derrick in the picture btw. Hayley's gran's brother, or however you explain it. Lovely man. He tucked in, as you can tell. But doesn't it all look gorgeous?

We got in, and we all wandered around. Sadly, the drinking facility wasn't open yet, we had to wait until 7.... bummer, no one told us. All of a sudden I realised... we have got the snacks, but no chippy pan! How can we prepare them? Shit, we had to leave, and go home and pick it up. I decided it was best that Hayley stayed, so me and Hayley's mum went. Once's we got the object, straight back, and enjoy the party.... f**k no, no mayonnaise or ketchup!!! I rushed to the Asda, which was around the corner. Whilst running to Asda, my mum, father, sister and brother-in-law drove onto the parking facility of the venue.... everything is going horribly wrong!

When I got back, people were waiting for me. I was the one with the money, and we had to pay in advance, but because I rushed off with all the money, the person behind the bar thought that everybody paid for themselves, which wasn't the case. F**k, everything is going wrong. I got stressed out, and everybody could see that. I do apologise, I didn't mean it. But someone had to be stressed. And it was me.

Once the whole thing started (the DJ took forever to set his stuff up), the party started. People started chatting to each other, and started eating. We didn't want the food to be wasted, so we encouraged people to eat as much as they wanted. The DJ played so many shitty tunes, we had enough time to eat, seeing as no one wanted to dance.

So many of our friends and family came around, we were pleased. Some faces were new to me, and I will probably forget them.... I do apologise. My memory is so rubbish, I try my best, but fail. I do remember a few names, but mostly faces. Maybe we should have used name-stickers.......

The party went as planned. I was risky, and asked the DJ to put a slow-dance record on. I went to my wife-to-be, asked her to dance with me, and we did. You don't believe me? We can dance!

We danced, like we were the only people on the planet. With the Dutch flag hanging behind us, it just makes the picture perfect.... a happy couple, and she looked so cute (and sexy!). I am going to marry the most gorgeous looking girl in the WORLD! Eat that.

After the song ended, we joined our families again. Sadly, the DJ didn't encourage people to start dancing, so a few girls went onto the dancefloor, and did some dancing to cheesy 90s music. Meh, not my thing. I'm a raver, can't you see? (he didn't even play rave music!!!!!). The DJ was alright, but not a party DJ.

My sister kept asking "who is he calling?" He used a red 'phone' as his headphone, which he didn't even needed, his mixing skills were shit.

I was being bold, and I went up to him, and asked for "Madness - Baggy Trousers", and the most unbelievable thing happend: Hayley danced with her uncle Martin. As I was told, he's not the dancer. Again, if you are reading this and having doubts:

See! I wasn't lying. Must be an English/London thing.... when they hear Madness, they go bonkers! But that's what I love about the British people, and especially the people from London.... their way of living. Even I danced with my mother, but I won't upload that picture.... embarassing..... for my mother ha.

People came and went. It was sad a few people couldn't stay that long, but at least they came! We had a brilliant time. Just look at these picture's.... people did enjoy themselves!









What a night it was. Or evening. The party ended at 11, and we had to clean up the mess. Everybody left, and it was just uncle Martin, gran, mum, Hayley and me. Some people did help, and your help was appreciated.

Once we started cleaning up the hall, the DJ got a bit annoying, he was absolutely wasted. He was walking to the bar at least 4 times, to get half a liter of beer. We had this table next to the stage with our cakes on it (who were made by lovely people, and we were just too afraid to cut them into pieces, we wanted it to be in one piece until eternity), and the DJ's set-up was next to it. Uncle Martin had to put all the chairs on the stage, and probably one wire got stuck, and mr DJ man got so annoyed, he chucked a few chair onto the floor, just inches away from our cakes. We all got annoyed, and hurried up.....

Look at these two cakes. If they got destroyed, I would be in jail: I would have beaten the DJ! Deffo. What a burk.

We had so much to take home, so I decided to drive twice: first with gran, mum and Hayley, and the second time with uncle. We did that, we talked to the owner of the property, and she gave us the okay, the venue was clean and organised again. Back at the house we needed to put all the food in a tiny fridge, and we managed... sort off.

In the living room we opened our presents and cards. And we do loved them all. All our friends and family were there. From the bottom of my heart (and Hayley's) we would like to thank everybody who came. You are wicked! Thank you for everything, you mean the world to us! For those who didn't made it, you have missed  a wicked party. One people still talk about!


I do probably miss a few bits and bobs, my memory is bad. Sorry if I missed a few bits...........



dinsdag 3 april 2012

The Day I Went On One Knee........

That was yesterday! The day I got engaged to Hayley. She is the love of my life, she is the one that takes me for who I am. She is the one that means the world to me. And this blog is dedicated to her, and us, and the day of all days!

I've decided a few weeks ago that Hayley is the one that I want to grow old with, and obviously you have to ask the most important question of all. And without thinking, I did ask it months ago, when I was half asleep. But I didn't ment it, it was a joke. Not a good thing to do, because the reaction I got, wasn't the one I was expecting. I wanted to do it proper, not when I lay in bed, dosing off to dreamland.

I told my sister, because I needed help. I am really unromantic, and she is a woman! She knows what a lady wants, so I was glad she helped me. We went to a thousand jewelries, and I never expected it to be so complicated. We both went to a jewelry, which looked a bit posh, but the service was great. There was only one big error, I didn't knew the ring size of my girl. It's not that I can look into her ring collection without getting caught (she lives in England, and I in Holland). So we ordered my ring, and they just had to wait for me to call in the ringsize of my girl. But I couldn't go on one knee without anything ring related, so we went looking for more. To this day, I really hate my sister, for dragging me into a million shops, seeing a million rings, it was the most painfull day of my life (so far). It made me think again about my first choice. Damn, why can't it just be one thing in one shop? Why isn't there an easier way to get a bloody ring?

Well, the day ended, and I knew I had to hide it from the whole world, but as I am the crazy Dutchman, that was hard. When my mom visited me a few days ago, I nearly got caught, because I had a magazine on the table, which was a ring magazine! Damn my memory. I got rid of it a.s.a.p., thank God for that!

I couldn't hide the ring, because every time I try to hide something, it will be found. So I simply placed it on the kitchen cabinet (on top, so she couldn't reach). And waited for the right moment......

The second of April was the day. I knew the day was going to be special, and I got nervous. Not really a hundred percent nervous..... but still nervous enough. The biggest issue was "how and where will I ask her?". I am full of idea's, but they were all shit! I was thinking of asking her in the weirdest way possible. Imagine this: I am on the loo, laying a big one, and place the ring on top of it.... I would call in Hayley, and she would see the ring on top of it.... just imagine. That was my most romantic way of asking her. My sister did send some video's of people proposing, which went horribly wrong. Who puts a ring in a milkshake, and nearly making his girl die? She swallowed the ring lol. That would have been a brilliant idea, typically me, but the poo idea was better.

But it wasn't the best. As I can remember, we had a picture taken in a park near, next to the castle called Erenstein. And I thought it was an amazing idea to ask her there (she loves the picture of us)....
And why not ask her there? It's a nice picture!

So we walked yesterday to the park, and it was busy, too busy, I wasn't expecting that. A lot of fishermen, and I am a bit shy, I didn't want to go on one knee, whilest smelly dirty bastards would be looking at us. Neh, not my thing. So we went further into the park, and found a romantic spot. Another bridge!

The things I can remember were "You are the world to me, I love you forever" - "I love you too forever" - "and ever" - "and a bit more" - "well, that depends" - "depends on what???" - "if you answer the question right: BABE, DO YOU WANNA MARRY ME????"

Sitting on one knee, she nodded her head, and I got scared. You might never know what that means, all the ladies do that, they say A but they mean B. But thank God, she answered with a tearfull YES!

This is the park were it all happened!


As you can tell, the first bridge was made out of stone, but the second bridge was made of wood. It's more romantic! lol.

We walked through the park, and we were both in heaven. The sun was shining, God really liked it! Yes, I went on one knee, and I literally shat myself. I've been nervous before, but when I did it, the nerves were taking over, and I didn't even ask "will you marry me?". I asked "Do you wanna marry me?" And I said BABE, instead of Hayley. Babe? That's cheesy!

Okay, I've shared enough. It's time for us to spend our time together, and make the most of it. She is leaving tomorrow. She will upload a million picture's of our food etc. You know how she is...

SHE IS MY FIANCEE!

maandag 13 februari 2012

My 9 days in the UK

The last couple of weeks I haven't been on this blog, because I had nothing interesting to mention. But now I do, I have been in the UK for 9 days, and OMG I have seen a lot and done a lot. Let me talk you through it day by day!

I went to England on the second of February, after I had an eight hour shift. My colleague's waved me goodbye, and I went off. It was a long journey, but I made it safely to Calais. This hasn't been my first trip by car, so I knew what to expect. Obviously I had everything with me, the boot was filled with stuff, 9 days in the UK ment a lot of undies! Ok, passport check. That's alright. Damn, they had to pick me again. I was stopped by a French bordercontrole officer, and he started mumbling in French to me. My response? "Je suis Hollands". That's right, I am multicultural.

But because I was there earlier, they let me go on an earlier ferry. P&O Ferries is such a good company, they have the best service out there.Sometimes it's just necessary to point out how good companies are, and they are superb!

The ride itself was alright, long and boring. Headphones on, and go. Read Jeremy Clarksons book, quite amusing. When I arrived in Dover, I knew one thing would happen, my car would be searched. So I made sure it wasn't a mess, because that indicates something. And yes, "sir, can you park your car there please?" Damn, again? It was alright, had to open the boot, and he had a look in the suitcase. He asked me if it was the first time, and how long I was going to stay..... I think. His accent was a bit shit, and I was still thinking in Dutch/French/English, so pretty damn hard to understand him.

Finally, the drive started. And immediately I drove the wrong way. Or my satnav wasn't working properly. Never mind, let's go. The ride itself was boring, and long. When I arrived in Southgate, I was a happy bunny. The red Volvo made it! Obviously the first hour was all about cuddling and kissing my girlfriend, I missed her a lot! And after that, it was time for bed........

The next morning, we had to wake up early to attend uncle Ron's funeral. He was Hayley's grandma's brother, and loved by everybody in the family. It sounds weird to say, but it was my first foreign funeral, never been to one abroad. And it was weird. I met him once, and he was a nice man. Nice and polite. And to pay my respect to the family and ofcourse my girlfriend, I went to it. The whole ceremony was nice, different compared to a dutch one. The place was packed!!!!! A lot of Ron's dancing club friend came to pay their respect, and a lot of people had to stand! Wow. The service was beautiful, and quite sad. After that, we all went outside, and Hayley had to help me there, to tell me who was who. Uncle Derrick, mr Policeman, etc. And to be honest, I am really bad with names, good with faces.

We all went to the pub afterwards. Well, I say pub, but it was the location where he used to dance the boogie woogie. And again, Hayley had to help me out who was who. The whole uncle/nephew business is so weird to me, she has to make a family tree for me. It was nice though, to meet the family, but it would have been better if it wasn't a funeral. But that's life. Sandwiches were there for those who were a bit hungry. I was a bit. I was still a bit knackered from the long journey.

After a few hours, we decided to go home. It has made us all a bit sad. And it gave us a weird feeling in our stomache. We gave Ron the best service possible, the man deserved it. But it's always weird to say goodbye to one you love.

But that's not the weirdest thing. Months ago, I decided to come to England for my girl, and to attend a rave. I Love Hard Beats, in Vauxhall, London. I really wanted to go, because it would have been my first Freeform party, but I knew that there was a problem. Hayley was still sad, and wasn't feeling well. I tried to talk her into bed, made sure she would be better the day after. But she insisted, she wanted to come with me. And she did. Driving across the Thames, at night, was nice, but going into Vauxhall...... there are better places on this planet to go to. We couldn't find a bloody parking space, and once we did, it took us 45 minutes to find the bloody club. And we have walked passed it a million times! I won't go into details, but my balls and Hayley's boobies were frozen!

The whole night was amazing, but I knew we couldn't stay there for hours. We had to go home earlier, and not attend the afterparty. I only wanted to hear a DJ duo play, and after that, we went home. Arrived in Southgate at 5 o'clock in the morning, jeez. Long day! Goodnight world!


Saturday was a lazy day. Me, Hayley and mum (Hayley's mum, but she is my second mum) went to Wetherspoons to have a lovely meal. It was nice. I don't want to bore you with the things we ate. The only thing I noticed in Wetherspoon was a lady who had a f**king huge moustache! Hayley and mum said it wasn't, but eh, my eyes..... they said to me it was a moustache! Damn.

We invaded Asda, and after that, went home. Snuggled underneath a blanket, and watched Take Me Out. Some tossers who shagged Jodie Marsh gave me a good laugh, never seen someone as stupid as he was! Lol. What a wanker. But never mind, it was good quality TV time!

Sunday, mmm. Bloody sunday. We wanted to go to Milton Keynes to see Uncle Martin and Caroline, but the bloody snow didn't agree with that. So we stayed in all day. It was a nice sight though, seeing the snow coming down.


So that was sunday. Monday was a different day! We (me and Hayley) went to Enfield town for some Valentine shopping, and we have bought a lot! She bought shoes, we bought a Simpsons boardgame, and had Krispy Kreme doughnuts! Thank God I have a bigger car now, where would I leave all those things?

Yes, TGI it was. It was a party in there, lovely service, lovely food. But when we got there, we were both so unbelievabely hungry, we could have eaten a cow!

Tuesday, that was a long day. We decided to go to the Imperial War Museum, and it was fascinating. So many things to see, so many things to experience. It was so informative, but also harsh. When we went into the "Holocaust" section, we couldn't say a word to each other, we just looked at each other, and sadly nodded. Horrible. Got nothing else to say!


Afterwards, the misses had made plans to see Claudia, her best friend! In Chinatown. Nope, we didn't had to fly to China, there is one in London. Next to the red light district of London. It was a lovely setting. She and Claudia chatted away, whilest I was feasting on food I had never seen before. Dutch Chinese food is a bit different. And check the chicken, it was undercooked! Once, but never again!


And afterwards to the M&M world. Wasn't my cup of tea, and it's bloody expensive in there! But if you are a sweetheart like Hayley, it's your place to be!

The day after we decided to go to Martin for a pub grub, and we would go to Milton Keynes around 12ish. We woke up a bit earlier to go out, and went to Woodgreen. Yes, finally I found my pair size 9 1/2. Pfew. Ok, let's have a look around in Primark. Lovely shop. And hungry as ever, so we sat down at BB's for a coffee, a hot cocoa and 2 pizza slice baguette thingies. It was tasty, but the woman was so slow, I could have grown a beard. Best coffee ever though!

Around 12 we went (me, Hayley, mum and gran) to Milton Keynes. A car full of ladies, how about that? Jealous? You should be. The drive was alright, nothing weird happened. When we arrived at uncle Martins house, we had a cup of tea, and went to the pub. It was lovely, but the personal had a face of a chimpansee. They were nice, but their faces.... they could have killed someone with that face!


Don't look at my horrible face though. Just stuffed it full with food, so don't blame me! Afterwards, back to Martin for a cup of tea, and later on, we went home (with a quick stop at Asda). It was a bloody good day! Spoke to my mum on the phone, and she informed me that the weather conditions weren't great in the Netherlands, so I was happy to be in the UK.

Thursday was the day where me and Hayley complained. We had walked for hours and hours. Bleh. But we went to Central London to go to the Museum of London. Don't believe me? Here is proof that I was there:


And again, my face. Can't help it, it's just my face! But we were there, and took NO PICTURES. Lol. How stupid was that? It was nice to see old stuff in there, but why in Gawds name were there so many French kids? Shouldn't they be on their Citroen bicycle, driving to school, with a baguette in their bag and listening to French music? Annoying fuckers.

But seeing as I was in London, I wanted tourist thingies. And obviously, the tube wasn't working properly, so we decided to walk to Leicester Square. A long walk, and again, my balls and Hayley's boobies were frozen. Had a Pizza Hut slice, and bought my stuff. Ps. for those who want to buy a "Keep Calm...." mousepad, don't. The mouse won't move properly on it, waste of money.

When we got back to Oakwood, we wanted food (greedy fuckers, I know) and decided to go to Oakwood Palace, where we stuffed our face. The service was excellent, and the food too. The only annoying bit was, that when we sat down, we were the only one's in, and the waiter was walking around the tables, desperate for us to order. And let's not forgot the American couple, who wanted chop stick, because "they didn't feel right to eat with knife and fork". A bit rascist?


We walked home in the snow, romantic as ever. Holding hands, kissing cheeks. Lovely time. I don't want to go home (NL), this is the country I should have been born in. My place to be.

The day after, we went shopping again. It's someone's birthday soon (gran) so we looked for something nice in B&Q, and obviously had Krispy Kreme again, which was filled with coppers (and I am not talking about coins, I am talking about the police!), 9 of them! Shouldn't they be crime fighting? Well, they deserve a break sometimes!


At home, we played games with my mother in law. Family Fortune, card games, and Air Hockey. And I have to be honest, she is bloody good at Air Hockey. Again and again she had defeated me. She should have been a hockey player?

The last day arrived, woke up early, and made sure that everything was packed and not forgotten. Hayley made me some sandwiches, and after a long kiss-away moment, I left. Took a few wrong turns, but made it safely to Dover. On the ferry, and arrived in Calais. I didn't hesitated, I drove on for 3 1/2 hour without stopping. When I got in Heerlen (NL) I went to my mother for some food, and had a nice chat. An hour later, I went home....... and missed something here. My baby.

So, for those who loved this story, and think we are a match made in heaven, can you give me a job? So I can have these feelings every day, without this distance? Come on people, who don't want me there?

These days were one of the best once's in my life. I love you Hayley, mum, gran, Caroline, Martin (yes, you too), and everybody else in the Davies family. I'll be back soon! I promise!

Ow, before I forget, I've made a snowman! The first one in bloody years! What do you think? Doesn't he look like Boris Johnson, the mayor of London?