Maybe.....

I will continue this blog.... I am not sure at the moment. I have this other site ( http://thecrazydutchmansblog.nl ) and to me, this other site is my musical blog. And I will have this one where I can put everything else on.

Well, what have I done recently? Nothing much. What has the world done? It has gone nuts. Just two days ago, some bloke in Liege has thrown handgrenades to a busstop, and killed 6 people (including himself). He injured over a hundred people.... this is insane. Why do we lose the plot?

It's unthinkable that people think like that. I honoustly don't have a clue where to get a gun, a handgrenade, or anything illegal. If you know people who sell them, or places where you can buy them, you are probably friended with the wrong people. I don't want to be friends with people who do illegal stuff. Guns and stuff, it's just wrong. Where are the good ol' days where you would use your fists if you had an argument with someone? Since when is it acceptable to use weapons?

The world has lost it. We are still in a recession, and the figures aren't positive. Summer 2012 we will be out of it (that's what they say). We are working so hard, but we struggle to survive. We manage in some way..... but a lot of people can't. People are struggling to survive. Money isn't a currency any more, we are going back into time where money wasn't the most important thing, food trading was.

It's sad to see a lot of people without a job, without money, begging for food. We shouldn't be begging for food. It's just wrong. So wrong.

And you know what the worst thing to me at the moment is? The snow! The snow is coming.... we don't know when, but it will arrive. And I hate driving in the snow, because it's like playing Russian Roulette with your life..... snow is dangerous, so fucking dangerous. How many video's are there online where you see cars crashing, because they can't control their car anymore? Snow is dangerous people. God, if you read this, please make sure that there is a lot of snow on the North and Southpole, but not in Europe? Thank you!

Make sure that you don't use the car when you don't need to go outside. Be safe people. Mr Snowman is a c*nt. A killer in disguise!!!

The End is Near....

it is. And I am not lying. It is coming to and end. I've done it for a long time, and quite frankly, I am fed up with it. I can't go any further. This hurts to say, but what's the point? I should terminate it. And immediately!!!!

No! I am not talking about the S-word. No way! Are you silly?!? I was talking about the end of my blogspot. It's been a long time, and a lot of blogs, but now that I've got my own website, it's better to finish it here, and let people enjoy it on my new site. Why would I have two sites? That's ridicilous.

Don't think that the bullshit blogs will stop, because they won't. Why should they? It's still maintained by me, so bullshit all the way. But where do you need to go too?

www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl

Put it on your favourites. Copy and paste it to somewhere. I don't care. But make sure you have it somewhere. But don't ask me afterwards why I deleted this, and what my new page is. I'll leave this here for a long time, so you got the time to change.

I will have a good day. It's going to be a sad day for blogspot, they have lost me. But who knows, one day baby Martin and Hayley will be on here too? If internet still excists. I hope so.

Maybe baby Martin and Hayley has survived a nucleair war, and he or she needs to repopulate the world. Obviously typing a blog would be the last thing on their mind. But you might never know.

I'll see you on the flipside!

www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl
www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl
www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl
www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl
www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl
www.thecrazydutchmansblog.nl

Get it?!!!!?

Television....

it's shit. No good programmes appear on telly, every time I'm watching it. During the day, stupid commercials appear, or do you call them infomercials? Not much info for me. Stupid. Typical American commercials "Yes Mike, with this machine, you will cut your bush outside quicker" "Angela, you don't need to work out anymore, you need Dr. Tamagotchi's relax tea, and you will loose pounds every week". Come on. Don't be stupid. If you want to loose weight, go to the gym. No pill will make you lose it that quickly and that easy. If it really worked, every American would use it.

And those talkshows? Stupid. How fun is it to sit there, and make fun of yourself? Stupid stupid stupid. "Yes, I had sex with my brother and uncle, and I don't know who's baby this is". That's just eurgh! I really don't like daytime television. It's just stupid and for those who find it interesting..... you must be asleep by the time the good shows appear.

But I would be lying if I would say that I don't watch some tellsell programmes, and be amazed. A device to make painting easier? No dripping? A good paintjob? I need that.... but there is always a but. A machine that makes food without using pans and pots? I fucking want that! But..... where's the catch? There is one of these informercials which I can't stop looking at.... the PaintPadPro. I've got a similar version of it, don't know the name, probably a cheap version of it: PeentPatProw. Don't know if it works, we will see next month. I will paint my flat with it. Hopefully it works. I will keep you updated. If not, that will be my advice to you: don't buy that shit. If it works, my advice will be "you don't need to buy that thing you see on telly, you can get a cheaper similar one in a pound/dollar shop".

Why am I talking about television? This year we celebrate the 60th birthday of television here in the Netherlands. And they show programmes that used to be on telly, but stopped. Television has changed alot. It can destroy and demolish alot. Where's the time when we played outside for hours and hours, until our parents shouted that we had to go back in? Where are the good times, where we played with marbles and painted the pavement? We need to stick behind the telly, otherwise we miss out on stuff. I don't hear anybody talking about television being addictive, but it is. How many people turn it on, the second they come indoors? How many people have got a tv in their bedroom? For what reason? I thought the bedroom was used to sleep in and have sex? Romantic, laying in bed, watching Sex and the City? Neh, not for me. No TV in my bedroom. Never will.

TV in a bathroom? TV in a lavatory? You see it on Cribs, all the celebrities have it. But why? I am not interested in the news when I am taking a shit. I don't want to see anything when I am weeing. A good book can be good too, you know? Read a good book when you lay in a bath. Nope, television is what people need. Are there any good shows on? Erm... not many.

Shows I watch, are interesting for my brain. I learn from it. Shows like James May's Toy Stories. Top Gear. Dirty Jobs. How Stuff Works. Those are shows where you might be able to use the information for personal use. James May reminded me that we had Meccano as kids. I totally forgot about it.

Don't get me wrong, stupid shows can be interesting too. I watch comedies all the time. Southpark. Scrubs. Friends. Two Pints of Lager. American Dad. Family Guy. I watch it all. But for a strange reason it still gives us advice, interesting advice. Southpark does it too. Seen the Human CentiPad? It's true. Big co-operations take over, we all click on "accept" and we don't read the rules. We submerge ourselves to whatever they write down in those tiny lines. We get screwed over again and again. We are lazy people.

Television is what brought us together back in the last century, and we were amazed by the power of it. And now we are all junkies. Addicted. Tellyheads. We can't live a day without telly. Damn you telly. Why are you so addictive?

And don't say you are not addicted! You are lying. We all watch a TV, even when we are abroad, sitting in a hotel lobby, and they show a local show. We all watch, without understanding it, but we need too. We need to be updated with daily facts and figures. But why not watch shows where we can learn from? Television has destroyed us, and the computer will do that too.

Go out and play. Only come in when it gets dark. Play, like you never played before. Sex? Have sex, without the telly. If you have a telly in your bedroom/bathroom/lavatory, turn it off, or leave it off. Enjoy sex/bathing/pooing. I know it might seem strange, but live life. Your life counts, because television can be turned on and off whenever you want. Your life is too precious, you can be turned off only once. No rebooting possible. So use it as long as you can! Play, for your own sake!! Play!

Tomorrow.....

I am old. 28 to be precise. Today I am young, I should do something special to remember today. What should I do? Walk around the streets naked, whilest dancing to the beat? Neh, not my thing. Should I do something nice? Water my plant? Neh, it's already dead. What should I do? Maybe something I've done for so many years..... nothing.

What have I done yesterday, and the days before that? I had a late shift on saturday and sunday, and I thought it was going to be a shitty weekend, but sunday turned out alright. 550 customers. That is less than a minute per customer, for 8 hours. Imagine that, meeting me at the till. You are served quicker than you can say "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious". I hate that film, I really do.

Yesterday I done fokk all. I went to the supermarket, and I thought I could buy a vlaai, a dutch delicacy, but they only had shitty one's. So I bought something else for myself, a bossche bol. Fucking great thing, it's .... erm..... it's a puff cake filled with whipped cream and covered with melted chocolate.  This is how it looks like:

But because it's so big, it's really hard to eat. Your face is always covered in chocolate, and you legs in whipped cream. It's so delicious, I will introduce it to my girl when she comes over next time. She doesn't know what hit her. Melted chocolate ladies! Melted! Isn't that what you want? Isn't that what you need? You don't need fish and chips, with horrible red sausages which look like a bulls penis.... you need a bossche bol.

Today I have an appointment. With the window cleaner. I forgot I had the appointment. I am dopey, I know. And after that, I will go out to get the car clean, and getting a vlaai. A vlaai is something which is eaten on birthdays and special occassions. This is how a vlaai looks like:

Ask Hayley, she loves them. Me and her were in an argument once, why I didn't introduce her to it earlier. I should have. But I can't be arsed. It's so common to me, I tend to forget it's special to foreigners. But Hayley ain't a englishman..... woman...... she isn't one for a full 100%. She loves a lot of dutch things, like frikandellen and bicky burgers. She loves our chips, our delicacies. She is more dutch than you might think. If I am going to move to the UK, I will fucking miss my frikandellen. It's going to be so fucking hard to live without them. Fish and chips? The fish stinks and the chips are covered with more grease then I've got in my hair.... so soaking wet. Bleh. We should introduce dutch chips in the UK. We could open up a shop called H&M's chippy shop, MarLey's ChipShop. Watch out, before you know it, it is going to be a great brand!!!!!!

But first my birthday. Send my present to me bitches! (lol, or give them to Hayley). But I need presents. Why? I am a greedy bastard, that's why!

4 days.....

until my birthday, so it's about time you get a present for me! Hurry up! Don't come crying that they didn't had it, you can go out right now. Chop chop, move. You know what I want!

Yes, 4 days until I turn 28. Magical it isn't. It's devastating. It's horror. When I want to retire here in the Netherlands, I have to work till the age of 67. So 39 years to go. That is pretty long. Too long. Can't imagine me working when I am nearly dead. Bleh.

28. Some of you haven't reached that age yet, and some of you already passed it years ago. Jealous? You shouldn't be. You should be proud of the age you are. Live life. There is only one life to live. And make the best out of it. Because I am....well, sort of. But if I continue the way I do right now, a burn out is near. Nearer than my retirement. 27 and a burn out? Yes, you can. Trust me, you don't need to be old to have that.

How are you? I am fine. Slept crappy, and my eyes aren't awake yet. My ears are nice and clean now! Bless a cotton bud. Today and tomorrow I am working, and it's probably the busiest weekend we had in a long time. And who else do you put behind the till? The craziest of them all, me! The one that can help customers while thinking of an island in the Pacific. The one that is quicker than a storm. Quick? You haven't seen quick yet, matey! I am so fast, customers are baffled by my quickness! Some customers specially come to the station after their holidays to see me work. That ain't a lie! I am like a robot behind the till. Zoef zoef, roef roef.

A robot, that's me. I even sell things people didn't buy. Like last week. A bus full of ze french. Horrible? A bit. They were all ravers going to Decibel, a big rave. And they were at my petrol station pretty early. They all needed the loo, so I let them. Having a angry frenchman isn't pleasant, so I let them. And one of the last persons who entered the shop, came to the till to pay for a bottle of water and something else, can't remember what else. He had an open can of Red Bull in his hand, and he shouted to me that he bought it somewhere else! I shouted back "you think that I am stupid? You don't walk into a shop with a drink they sell there? Come on, give me the barcode!" I scanned it, he paid for it, and got so angry, he threw the can to the till! Lol, that's active selling!

Was I hurt? Nope. But pissed off, the whole till was covered in Red Bull. And I couldn't mop the floor, because customers kept coming in, and due to safety reasons I wasn't allowed alone in the shop (the window was closed). Bleh, sticky floor.

Hopefully tonight will go quickly. I don't want to have a shit shift, those are crappy. And when it's busy and the achievement is big, I am always happy. I am pleased pretty easy.

BUT NOT THAT EASY! Now come on, go to the shop and get me a present. I will have a cake and coffee for those who come. But don't think that you live far away is an excuse! It's shopping time! Chop chop! Or however you spell it!

It's been quiet here....

I haven't been on here for a long time. I am sorry, I was so busy. You couldn't imagine it. So busy, I didn't even had time to wipe my arse after a shit. That busy? Yes!

How am I? If I would say that I am fine, that would be a lie. Had the worst sleep ever. And now I've woken up with a massive headache. I hate it. Last night there was a massive thunderstorm, I've never experienced one like this before. Flash after flash, all the time. And when you would hear the thunder, some of them were so loud, it would give me a heart attack. Bloody hell, I am afraid of thunder. My bed is all soaked. No I didn't piss in my bed, but it's sweat!

Look at this picture. This was made in Limburg, the county I live in. Looks heavy, don't it? And stunning too. I don't mind looking at thunder, but I simply can't sleep when it's thundering. You never know when to expect a blast, bang or however you call it. That's the worst bit.

I really like looking at it, and be amazed of the power it produces. If we would capture a thunder, we could supply a town of electricity for a year. Amazing, innit? If they captured it all last night, we would never have to worry about electricty. It continued for an hour or 2, and then it went with one big bang. Fokk me, I had a wet bed. (And again, not piss).

Today? Probably have rain and thunder and hail. Am I scared? Not yet, I'm not in bed yet. Hopefully no one gets injured anymore, or die due to the heavy weather, like last week in Belgium. I've seen the video's of Pukkelpop, and it scared me. I love going out, and I've been to such big parties, and I can imagine me standing there. Please, don't let anyone die of the weather anymore.

And let no one die because of a war. Syria, and Libia. Weird that they fight for freedom, and getting slaughtered by the one they voted for. The world has gone nuts. Maybe I know why it all goes nuts right now............. it's God sign, saying the summer of 2011 has ended.

And I didn't even have my holiday yet. Bleh. Thunder away God. I will be having my holiday when it's cold, thanks.

My looooooonnnngggg weeeekkkkeeennnddd (Part 2)

This is the second bit of our long weekend last week. I could have waited any longer with typing this, but I have probably forgotten alot by next week.

We were ready to hit Birmingham centre, Hayley was all dressed up, and I was...... well, I was ready hours ago. We determined that we sort out the way to the HMV Institute before we went back to the hotel, seeing as we both have never been there. Thanks, Google Maps. It was a short walk from Brittania Hotels to HMW Institute, 10 minutes maximum. We walked to it, got lost (passed some church and that chefs restaurant, Jamie Oliver). But we made it. The cue was short, we were there early. 10ish, I think. We were checked, and at the entrance we got in pretty quickly. We only needed to find our code, and that was it. Yes, we were in!!!!!!

OMG this building is big! As I said before, I've never been here before. We figured out that if we walked straight ahead, we would walk into the main room. So we walked downstairs, see what area was there. It was the Classic area, and DJ Sc@r was playing oldskool tunes. Yes, this is what I love and adore. Like Clear Vu said! She had a good time, and so did we. It was a bit empty in the beginning, but that didn't spoil the fun. Ok, let's get drinks. Hopefully it isn't expensive, like a famous club in London, where we paid more than 20 quid for four drinks. Nope, this was alright. And this was actually the first rave where they use a machine which has the price on it, so you don't need to be shouted at by the bartender. Handy machine! Should be introduced all around the world!

Sc@r was smashing it, but we wanted to see what this venue had to offer. What's this passage way next to the stage? A minor thing, the way around was poorly shown. You will figure out why in the next few lines.....

We got outside! Pfew, ciggie time. The atmosphere was relaxed. People were sitting down, chilling. But why? I thought they came for a reason, to level the floor even more by stamping hard!? Never mind, fag time was over, and we went back in again. We had to leave the Classic room, we wanted to explore. Upstairs then..... The Main Room. DJ Joey Riot was smashing it, and he had a great time. Me too! I went mental on his tracks. I think MC Wotsee was MCing, I am really bad in remembering things. But it was great! The atmosphere was laid down... it was so relaxed. Yeah, DJ, give it! And he did. But where is the other room? I am dutch, so European. And I want it a bit harder! So where's this famous Hardcore Techno room? Back on the stairway, and up. VIP? Nope, not where we needed to be. Ok, let's ask someone. "I ain't got a fokking clue". Yes, really helpfull. Bugger me. Where is it?

It took us half an hour to figure out where it was. Behind the toilets, or next to it (depends where you stand). But when we entered, I was shocked. It was empty! DJ Vortex was smashing it with Speedcore, it was ridicilous. It was hard too! But every rave I went to, where ever it is, always starts slowely, and end hard. So the hardcore would be first, and speedcore would end the night. But Vortex (no offense) had the honour to smash my ears to pulp. I can't stop listening, I have to continue.

Yes, this is what I came here for. DJ Marc Smith b2b DJ Brisk. Yes! European Gabber. Bring it on! Marc Smith was killing it, for real. Unbelievable. He was so bouncy behind the decks, and he must have destroyed them. Scratching all the way. DJ Sy has to watch out, Marc is on his way to become the King of Scratching.

Even though it wasn't packed to the max, the people where really cool with it. You had space to do your thing. And I did. Sweat? Yes, all over my body. The floor became so sticky, it felt like glue. Maybe next time other shoes? This is shit.

Brisk and Marc performed perfectly. A lot of famous European tracks, and I liked them all. It was so short, by the time I was covered from top to toe in sweat, it was over. Marc showed us some skills, and Brisk was off the stage.... maybe he ate to much Sinfull Sauces... Never mind.

I think Scott Brown was next. I don't know, sorry. My brain is still fucked. But I needed some fresh air, and a fag. So we walked outside. Outside was packed to the max, there were more people outside than inside of the Hardcore Techno room (let's call it the Hard Room, much easier to typ). Fag time over, let's get back inside. Downstairs. Yeah! Oldskool tunes. I love them. But we wanted to see who was playing upstairs.

Hixxy! The man himself. Busy as hell! No time to breathe, time to get moving. Moving? Well, just bounce up and down on one spot, there wasn't room to move, nor breathe. Ow? What the fok just happened? Equipment failure? That's a bummer. Or was it part of the show? Don't know, but the people all shouted at the DJ! And he got back to it quickly. I loved it. It wasn't to hard, if you compare it to the Hard Room, and not as slow as the Classic Room. It was nice!

MORE DRINKS, I'M GETTING DEHYDRATED!

DJ Brisk was back behind the decks again! This time in the mainroom! And I liked it. A lot of new tunes, and he just simply won't tell me which remix of "CLSM'S I will wait" he played. A lot of tunes which had breakbeat influenced bits in it, and I liked it alot. I don't know if it is a new thing in the UK Hardcore scene, but the room to breathe got a bit bigger. I think people still need to adapt to the sound. And they should! It's the best! Brisk started with famous UK tunes, and ended with famous EU tunes. Am I back upstairs again? No I wasn't. Why so short? I want this set to be longer!!! Meh. Brisk ended, and I needed to catch up with him. So I didn't see or hear who played after him. I am sorry! Had a long weekend, and catched as much as I could. But due to a fucked up timeline (my own timeline) I couldn't stay longer. A quick picture with Brisk, and a visit to the merchandise stand, and it was time to head back to the hotel.

It was quiet in Birmingham. And I loved it. OMG my ears must be bleeding. Such a weird feeling in my stomache. I want to go back, and hope this night would never end. But it did for me. And I would like to thank everybody at Uproar Summer Sounds for a wicked night. But please, next time, put the timetable online, so I could plan who to see and who I sadly can't see. And make the information a bit more visable. I couldn't find the Hard Room, it took half an hour. And a bit more lightening stuff in the hard room. It felt like all the equipment went into the main room, and upstairs was left out.

We went back to the hotel, and went to sleep. Woke up with our ears still messed up, and had a bath. We must get rid of the smell. Bleh. We were disgusting! A walk to the station had to be stalled, we needed to get birthday presents for uncle Martin. A quick tour around Brum, and then back to the station. Finally, a train where we could actually sit in. Marylebone station is where we got off, and took the tube to Oakwood. A quick walk, and we were home. Uncle Martin was there, and we talked a bit. After that a visit to the local Wetherspoons was necessary. We did it, got back home, and went to bed, because we had to wake up at 4 o'clock in the morning.

We woke up, got ready for the departure, and we got at St Pancras on time. A quick kiss, and a tear, and then... the journey back home. I wish this weekend never ended. My mum picked me up at Heerlen Station, and an hour later I took my own car, and drove home. I missed it a tiny bit. Hayleys room ain't big enough for a kingsize bed; that was the only thing I missed lol. And now I am here, and I miss Hayley.

For those DJ's who read this, can't you give me a job over there? So I don't need to come over every time, and I can live in the country I love and adore? Thanks!

My looooooonnnngggg weeeekkkkeeennnddd (Part 1)

It's was a long weekend. A weekend with ups and downs. Mostly ups. Lots of laughter. Me and my girl had a lot of fun. I'll explain my weekend.

Friday I started my journey very early. I came out of my nightshift, and I was so knackered. My mum offered a lift to the station, so I could leave my car at her place, so she could watch over it. She did, bless her. I tried to get a short kip, but I couldn't. I knew it was my old bedroom, but it wasn't simply mine anymore. Stupid suntanning exquipment in there, like I had that when I lived there.

She dropped me off at Heerlen Station. From there the journey started. Suitcase and handluggae ready? Yes. So let's go. A quick kiss on the cheek, and on the train. My first exit would be Maastricht station, where I would take another train. My suitcase was bloody heavy, full of clothing.

I waited for the next train to arrive at 09:06 in the morning. And like 2 minutes before, the nice train station sound system lady announced that the train wasn't driving at all. And she was sorry. Sorry didn't help me at all. I asked the conductor at the station what my options were, because I had to catch the Eurostar. He said "take the next train, it will leave at 10:06". But the journey was approximately 2 hours, and my Eurostar train would leave at 12:25. So it would be a close call. Afraid as I was, I called NS Hispeed and asked for help. She kindly helped me out, by saying that if I would miss the train due to a delay caused by NS, I would be on the next train. Pfew, lucky sod. The train at 10:06 arrived, and took me to Liege (Belgium). From there, I needed another train to Brussel Midi. Bloody heavy suitcase, not suitable at all.

On the train to Brussel Midi, and everything was fine. But my mind was rushing and thinking "what if I miss the train?" I got at Brussel Midi, and had to rush from one end to the other. Fucking luggage annoyed the shit out of me! But I wasn't the only one late, so a lot of us rushed to the check-in. Passport check? Check! Metal detector? Check. On the train! Woohoo.

I got in London at some point, I can't remember right now. But what I do know is that my girls mum was waiting for me, because Hayley couldn't pick me up. She had to work. Bugger. So no nice snog from her. Could ask her mum..... neh! Lol.

It's was crowded at London St. Pancras. Don't ask me why, must have been the holidays. We got into the tube, the lovely tube. (The reason mum picked me up, is because Hayley had my Oyster card, and still has..... so next time someone has to pick me up again.....). I got at Hayley's house, and went straight to bed. I was so knackered, couldn't even stay awake to dream.

Hayley got back from work. And she looked nice in her suit. I love ladies in a suit. So sexy. I could talk about the dirty stuff on here, but I know it's not appreciated. It involves love making! Now I said enough. For those who might think..... she ain't getting pregnant!

We stayed in, and watched the Amy Winehouse documentary. I did it for her, and for the fact that there was nothing much on telly either. It was all shit.

Sleep! Yes, we both needed that. When we woke up the next day, we woke up early. We needed to catch the train to good ol' Brum (Birmingham). When we got to Marylebone, it was busy. One milkshake for Hays, for me a coffee and a quick fag. Once they announced the platform, everybody rushed to get on the train. 3 coaches for so many people. We were crowded. A lot of people had to stand all the way to Brum. Fuck sake. Shit trains. Thank God I could sit on my suitcase, or Hayley. It wasn't fun at all, but everybody felt the same.

When we got to Birmingham Moor Street, we were happy and pleased. The station was so nice to see,looked old school. It was a station that didn't belong in the brandspanking new Birmingham centre, but nobody cares. When we got out of the station, good ol' Googly Mappy helped us towards Brittania Hotel, on the new Street, next to Primark. The walk was short, maximum of 10 mins. But obviously Hayley had to guide us, and we all know ladies can not read maps. So we got lost. But I got us back on track!

When we saw the sign "Brittania Hotel" we were happy. But then we got scared, because the entrance was in a dark alley. OMG, what if it is dodgy? Shit. But when we entered, it was magical. Classic music, everywhere marble where your eyes could take you! A quick entry check, and we got the hotel keys. It was so nice. And my Hayley has thought of me, and she choose a smoking room. Not actually a smoking room, which could mean it is on fire!!!!

We entered the room, and there was a huge bed in the middle. A nice shitter, a nice bathtub. A TV, which we didn't use. And a window, with a shitty view. Hayley looked outside, and I thought (when I took my sock off) I could hit her with it. And I missed, and it fell outside. If someone sees a sock laying on a roof there, it's mine. I am sorry for that, please send it back to me.

We agreed to get some sleep first, and then we would go out. We ate something, I think we both had hamburgers. We saw a lot of emo's there, must have been an emo concert near. Or Birmingham is the gate to hell.... could be. But not in my eyes. It's such a lovely place, so wide and spacious.

After our food we went back to the hotel to get our clothing and hair and smells fixxed. I was ready hours before, Hayley obviously took hours...... Ladies do that.......

The next blog will be about the rave itself. I am to bored and tired to typ more, I'll do it tomorrow!!!!

My last blog....

This is going to be my last blog, before I go to England. So there is no point in visiting this site, or say to me "where are your blogs?" Because I won't typ one whilest being in England. Why should I? I am with the loved one. She will be dreading this weekend, but we will make the best out of it.

I've just imagined. What if I took grandma with me? Hahahaa, imagine that? Lovely grandma would go mental! Hahaha.

I need to apologize for my last blog. I am sorry for those who read it and got offended by it. It wasn't my intention to offend anybody. So I am sorry. But if you think you will get offended in the future, don't visit this blog. Because I am know for being straight forward, right in your face. I won't hide my opinion. And if you don't like it, don't visit this. Thank you.

It has been a few weird days at work lately. Someone (a customer) got hit in his face with a knuckle-duster two days ago, and yesterday a truck nearly drove into the shop. The driver was so drunk when they arrested him at the next petrol station. Unbelievable. A polish truck driver, always up to no good. Why drink and drive? My colleague was scared stiff when it happened. Imagine seeing a truck coming towards you in full speed, you think that your life is ending. Bleh.

Hope tonight will be a quiet night. Don't want to do alot. I want a quiet night. Those are the best. Got the best music with me, to get me into the weekend mood. I simply can't wait to go bonkers. Hayley will love it, seeing me rave! I'll get her to rave too! Shake that shimmy! Woohoo! I know I will (what is a shimmy, anyway?)

I can't believe it's already thursday, or is it wednesday? Time flies by when you are having fun, or flies are fun, when you are having time? Have a nice week, and I'll speak to you. Well, only to those who are really interested in the inside of my brain! Arriverdeci, or something italian!

Silence....

it has been silent on here the last couple of days. But I've been busy the last couple of days, at work. Or at home. I am so knackered lately, and I simply can't be arsed to typ a blog. And when I do want too, I tend to forget. Sometimes a day not behind the computer is a Gods gift, I think. A bless.

I've been watching films lately, films that were covered underneath a pile of dust. I tend to watch films, and then store them for a long time. And if a film is shit, I only watch it once. Or I just buy it, for no particulair reason. I think I've got 10 films I have never seen. How weird is that?

Films which really happened, are interesting. Like the film "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford". It's a fucking hillbilly film, but so wicked. I don't know why. Or "The Assassination of Richard Nixon". I like things that happened for real. Or Zodiac. Interesting stuff. I don't like films that Oprah Winfrey supports. Stupid chick flicks. Bleh. Come on, we get it. Us men treated ladies like shit. Okay, okay. Slavery is a bad thing. We get it. Yes, racism is not cool. Okay. Bleh. That's why I don't like Oprah. Always going on about the past, and only the bad things. And don't get me started about Dr Phil. He is a knob. Bleh.

Operation Repo, who has seen it? It's probably the worst show on dutch telly now. So horrible. So bad. But so amusing to watch, to see how stupid Americans are. I don't get it at all. They show the Americans in the most horrible way. I would be ashamed if I was an American. So embarrasing. It shows the level of stupidity, at the other side of the Ocean (Sorry Tami). I can't believe people live like this. Living a fake life. I don't like people who tend to be somebody, and proud of their nation, but they shouldn't be. America is great to live in? Could be. But the promising land? Nope. It has I think the highest debt ever seen. Billions of dollars. And still, the USA send troops around the world, and putting billions into warfare. I don't get it. Why pretend to be great? Why not organise your country first?

I hate shows where you hear a laugh tape in the background. It shows to me that it ain't that funny, if you need a tape. I don't need someone to hold up signs, which states if I can smile, laugh, or clap my hands. If it ain't funny, drop it.

You know what is a crap programme? Shows about people's live, in full extend. Pregnant at 16? Tough shit. Should have zipped your jeans back up, before the act. Ow ow ow, it's so hard, raising a kid at that age, and you don't have work. OMG, it so bad that you and your boyfriend can't talk to each other anymore...... I do have the answer to that.... :YOU ARE STILL KIDS! NOT MATURE. Mature people face consequences. We deal with things. Teens just wanna have fun. Fun, but nothing else. And btw, you don't have a job, no money, a baby.... how come you can drive a big American car? How fake? How many decades are you going to pay for your loan?

I don't see the fascination with the USA. My new colleague, who I simply can't work with, goes on and on about America. She doesn't drink european coffee, only American. Blah blah blah. Fake fake fake. Why live the American life? I don't get it. Explain it to me? I rather be an englishman. Real. Maybe a bit miserable, with yellow teeth (as the Americans always show them on cartoons). But they are real. They deal with things in a better way. Ofcourse young pregnancy is a problem there too, but as far as I know, there ain't a huge fanbase in the UK around a programme that shows teens with problems. It ain't a normal thing, and it should never be.

Sorry if I go on and on about this, but it annoys me. People always complain, but never know when they have a good life. You might be miserable, but you still have a house, a car, food, water, everything you need to survive. And you complain about your baby? It costs money? Is that really what counts in this world? Money? Shouldn't you be afraid that your kid comes on this planet, being deformed? Or having a disease, like AIDS/HIV? Or die because of no water, or food? Is money really important? Is it important to dress you kid in the latest fashion? In Africa, they don't have designers clothes. They don't care. They were born naked, they will die naked. No Gucci bags around their thin wastes. They will die, and no one cares. But youngsters in the USA only care about the price of a baby. Disgusting.

Simple answer: use a condom, or don't have sex. The answer to the world economy? Don't give people money, who can't pay it back. Let them starve, they let other die too, without concerning.

Yes, let's give ourselves the luxury of spending money that ain't even ours, and don't care about others. We have done it for centuries, why would we change?

Maybe it's good just to be quiet, like I am going to change the way people see this world. Silence.....

(Note: no computers were harmed in the process of typing this blog. Please don't get offended)

My typical Saturday Blog.....

this is a typical one, which doesn't make any sense. It could be boring to you, as it is to me. I've got nothing to tell today, as far as I know. I could talk about my love life, but I don't know if you (the reader) is ready for that. And I don't want to post something online which could bite me in the arse, and in Hayley's arse too. I know I sometimes say too much, and I certainly don't want that to happen lol.

I could talk about my bollocks? Interesting enough? They are big and sweaty..... Nothing else to mention.

Yesterday I went to my local store, to get my package (no, not my balls). It was a voice recorder, which I ordered a few days ago. I told you before about that interview, so no point in explaining it again. But I needed something to record it with, because writing it all down, it's too much. Listening to the podcasts gave me the impression that DJ Brisk is a walking vocabulairy.... voca.... vocasomething. By the time I wrote the answer to the first question, he would be at question 14 already (not that I have prepaired any questions, it's so damn hard). I've started with writing stuff down, his past, and now I need to do the same with his present life.

But a recorder always comes in handy. So that's why I ordered it. But I never thought that it would be so tiny (again, not my balls). The recorder is the size of a small vibrator!!! Unbelievable. But I could have guessed tho, for 29 euro's. Hopefully he will take me serious. Now I need a good video recorder, hoping that I can borrow Hayley's camera. Hayley, if you read this, please clean the storage on your camera. Take everything off, before I borrow it. I know myself, I've got a brain like a monkey... I tend to forget alot. And I don't want to start recording, and all of a sudden it would say "no memory left". I would get scared and angry lol.

I simply can't wait to see Hayley again. And go to Birmingham. I have never been there, hopefully it's a cool city. Not a shite hole. We could do a sight seeing, me and Hayley. And later that night, go raving. I don't know if Hayley has told her friends, but they must think she is crazy for doing that. She is crazy..... in love. With me! No one else. Well, to be honoust, who doesn't love Robbie Williams? If he would sing "Angel" when I am trying to get some sleep, he could violate my body. Haha, imagine that?

Colin Firth is also known to be fit. Tami is in love with him. Not me. He ain't fit, he is cool. Not fit. And if you, Tami, think otherwise, I'll send you some videos of me wearing a Kings uniform and stutter. You would immediately change thinking. There ain't nobody fitter than me! Fact! Yes.... ffffffffffffffffffffaaaaaccccttttt.

This blog is absolutely nonsense. Let's end it with a nice quote, before I loose readers.

I am the greatest. I sting like a bee. - the bee that annoyed me yesterday!

Charity?

Should I do something for them? I've just been on the T-mobile site, and it had a brilliant item on it: send your old mobile to them, and then they do stuff with it, and all the money goes to charity. Sounds good, got several phones in the cupboard, which I don't use at all. I don't know if poor people in Zimbabwe want to use my old Nokia, but if it makes them happy, why not? I am thinking about it. It sounds cool. And if the phone wasn't useable, they said that it's full of parts which can be re-used again, and the money they make of selling that, goes into charity. Or however it works. I'm not sure, but it looks cool.

The last time I've done something for charity is years ago. Me and Hayley sat in a pub, when all of a sudden someone from the Salvation Army came by, and just moved his money box around. And a lot of people donated, they are the true heroes! In the Netherlands we had someone called major Bosshardt, she was one of the people who worked for the Salvation Army and did it till the end. She was 90-summit, and still worked hard, day and night for those people who needed it. She was awarded with a lot of titles, she deserved it. She was a heroin.

They are out on the street, even when we think it's too damn cold to be out. They serve food for the poor and homeless people. Me, I wouldn't do that. I donated in that man's box (that sounds so wrong). But I like the idea. It's so nice, and the dedication is huge.

We also do things on television, for charity. But I simply can't watch that shit. Celebraties on a bloody phone, collecting your money. What's the point in that? Why not let them donate millions! We work hard for our pennies, they do too. Why not let them donate something, instead of just answering the phone? Imagine me talking to the Prime Minister? Nope. I don't care, if I would donate money, I couldn't care less who answered the phone.

But I can't stop thinking..... where does the money go to? I've watched Red Nose Day thingy with Hayley, and it all looked cool. Gordon Brown with JLS and some other people around a table, that was funny. George Michael. That was funny. But then..... you could see people walking around in Africa, showing us europeans the poor people, and what our money can do to them. Looked nice, but who payed the airplane company for those tickets to Africa? Because it doesn't look free. Do all those people work for free? What about the camera man? The sound man? Do they charge themselves for working on it? I don't get the whole idea. It looks free, but who pays for all? Because the world doesn't spin around for free.

That's why I only donate to the Salvation Army. You can immediately see them working. They work for the money. And the amount of people who are homeless and poor, is so huge! I never thought it was that high. In the four biggest cities in the Netherlands, there are 20.000 people homeless. 20.000 people! Can you believe that? I can't. So hurray for the Salvation Army. Help our people! They need help too. And my pennies will go your way, whenever you are near!

Me and Music (part 4)

We are back on the music subject again. I've shown you in recent blogs what music is/does to me. And now I will inform you my recent musical experience. Everything music related will be put here. As you all know, I will be raving with Hayley in Birmingham the end of July. Never been to Birmingham, so that will be a new. I am a Birmingham virgin. Hopefully she treats me well.

Music is a great influence for me. It's bigger than any religion. Thank God that I am a non believer.... or am I? The amount of times I've used the term "Thank God" should give the game away. But I don't know. We ain't going to talk about God and Jesus, but music. And the power of music is bigger than anybody can imagine. As one DJ said "Music is our universal language". And it's true.

I've tweeted alot about my neighbours, that they must hate me for playing music very loud. I honoustly don't have a clue, because they have never complained to me. Not that I am waiting for that, but it's a fact. I must have a good and solid ceiling and floor. No beats and bass goes through that. I hope so, don't know it.

I've been addicted to other styles recently. But I like everything to be honoust. People are amazed when they are here in the flat, and I play the weirdest music. Classic music? What? You? Yes, me! Why not? Music is music. Music from the last century, like around the 1920s? I like it. Jazz? I like! Why not? It's beautiful. I don't like some music genre's, because they are dumb. Like Dutch music. I don't like this typ of music. Folk music ain't for me. No thanks.

Ok, I know you are thinking..... "but he likes his beats hard, his bass deep and the melodies strong?" Yes. But why not be open minded? Here's a list of all genre's I adore the most! Be prepared for a rollercoaster through dance music.... and see styles you have never heared off!

2step, acid, acidtechno, ambient, Bassline, breakbeat, breakcore, classical, classics, club, dancehall, darkcore, deephouse, disco, drum & bass, dubstep, early hardcore, early hardstyle, early rave, eclectic, electro, eurodance, french tek, frenchcore, funk, garage, goa, groove, happy hardcore, hardcore, harddance, hardhouse, hardstyle, hardtechno, hardtrance, hiphop, house, industrial hardcore, jump, jungle, lounge, minimal, new beat, oldschool, progressive, psytrance, r&b, raw hardstyle, reggae, reggaeton, salsa, schranz, soul, speedcore, techhouse, techno, tekno, terror, trance, tribal house, triphop, UK hardcore, urban.....

I tried to explain to Hayley the basic difference in music styles, but she doesn't understand it. She thinks it's all bass, beats and melody. All the same. All electro music. That's a bit discriminating. People who think that, you shouldn't think that. Because it isn't. As I said in a blog before, don't get me started lol.

She means it well. I will get her to know the difference to dutch Hardcore and english Hardcore. It's all about the B.B.M. (Beats, Bass and Melody, not Blackberry Messaging). The funniest thing is that my mum likes Trance music. She really likes it, all because of me! I've been to Sensation etc, and I was always into Trance music, so that's how she got familiar with it. My dad, he gave me the electro - virus. He was the first to listen to it. I think because him, I am the way I am. Thanks paps! You are a hero.

When me and Hayley were on the phone, we were talking about the rave (Uproar - Summer Sounds) and we were talking about the hotel. She didn't realise it that the rave starts at 10ish and ends at 6ish. She sounded a bit dissapointed, because it will be hours and hours of...... well..... fun for me. She will love it, the atmosphere will be cool. I can't wait. Maybe she will throw away those Madness CDs and buy some UK Hardcore CDs? I doubt it tho. But if she will throw them away, there will be an argument! I like Madness too. Not as much as her, but I do like it.

But sometimes I can't understand a word they are singing/saying. Sorry love, I ain't from London.

A funny thing to say tho, when someone asks you where you from. "My mothers vagina!"

Sorry!

Stupid Customer Service...

they keep on annoying me. I've just been on the phone for 10 mins, for an answer which I already expected. What a bummer. It costed 3.50. For an answer I'd already knew. What an annoying shit. But the man who helped me, he was nice. It was NS Hispeeds customer service. I hate the fact that for everything you need to call a number which costs money. Where is the customer service? Where is the time where you could call a free number for information?

My ticket is booked. It had a fault written on the confirmation detail, it said Martin Zeelandt, and I am definately a "van". Not German, but Dutch. Germans have "vons". We have "vans". And I am one of them. And this Dutchy will invade the UK again. It's becoming a common thing. I am more in the UK, then in France..... that's a stupid thing to say! We shouldn't never be in France, because the country stinks.

And my wife to be one day called Hayley, or Hayhay, or Hayfever, or Booboo, she has sorted the tickets. So we are going to rave. Rave damn hard. Because we are 'ard. I can't wait to see those wonderfull DJ's doing their thing live! I wanna go bonkers. Ow, I can't wait. I think Hayley can wait forever.... she ain't the raver I want her to be..... yet. Maybe she is going to get addicted to it, you might never know.

My day so far? Been boring. Been shite. Long day, had to do a lot of cleaning. But everything is sorted. I went to Heerlerheide, to my parents house. They forgot to put the bin back inside, so I did that. And I thought "why not visit my friend the barberman?" And I did. I drove to the centre to park my car, and all of a sudden a motorcycle came out of nowhere. And if my reflections were crap, he would have been dead. Scared the living shit out of me. He came out between parked cars in a street, and so fast, I couldn't see him, until it was too late. And he just smiled when he drove off. I got out of the car and shouted at him some word I won't reply. I was so furious. He could have been hurt, and my car in pieces, and he was just smiling. Dumb f**ker. Adrenaline was pumping through my body, and it ain't funny when that happens, and you have a headache already...... your mind goes ballistic.

What else have I done, besides being a murderer? Yes I am a murderer, I pay someone to cut my hair, and kill it! He is a prostitute! I pay him to release me from a burden! Lol. Never thought of it that way. I did post a few letters. Interesting? Not really, but 3 of them were sad letters. They were condolences - cards. My girlfriends grandma's sister died recently, and it's a normal thing to send a card, to let them know you think of them. But how in Gods name do you write anything on those cards? I've never written a letter like that before in English! It's not easy in dutch, imagine it being twice as hard to write one in English. But I hope they know I ment everything in it. R.I.P. Lilly.

We had a lovely time with her. Obviously I was scared, because I was meeting a legend in Hayleys family. So I was very quiet. But I loved her food, she made nice sandwiches. Bless her. We all should be thinking of Hayley and her family, during this hard time.

Losing someone in your life is so damn hard, I know. It's shit, to be honoust. I am sorry I can't be there, but I will be there the end of the month. So if people want to meet up, come to Birmingham and see Hayley dancing with glowsticks. I hope.

Sunday mornings are crap.....

and I know it. You know it too. It's so horrible. It's a day where you just want to lay in bed and never get out of it. And when you get out of it, you are going to make breakfast for your loved one (if you are single, the loved one is your own belly). But you don't need to wake up early. Why would you? It's fokking sunday.

And here I am. Awake and tired. And the coffee ain't kicking in yet. It's so hard. I've been to a birthday yesterday, and it was fun. I stayed longer than expected. I thought I would go there for an hour, but the bloody food wasn't prepared until 7 o'clock, I think. Grrrr. But the food was good. Except those black frikandels and German sausages. And I got the blame! I wasn't the masterchef, but because I didn't pay attention to the BBQ, I got the blame. Lol. Thanks Danny, you dick lol.

His daughter, Anna, is funny. But she forgot my name all the time. She kept on shouting "ey boy, come here". Boy? Who, moi? Lol. And she kept smacking me in the face. Thanks, hun. I love to annoy kids, it's some kind of revenge of a shitty childhood I had. And I will have my revenge one day......

When I was a kid, Danny was just a few years older, so also a kid. And we were best mates. He held me on his shoulders, and when he walked from the balcony to the flat, he tripped on those curtains you see people have, to keep the flies away. But that resulted in me falling on my face, and I do believe my teeth through my lip. Thanks Danny! I will have my revenge one day. Anna will sit on my shoulders once. You can't save her forever hahahaa. Yes I am crazy. I could put Danny on my shoulders, but I think that would be impossible. Have you seen the size of him? He is massive, he will destroy my shoulder and all my muscles. One day Danny.....one day!!!

And those bloody dogs, they always hang around me. I don't know why, but they do. Miriam had her dog with her, and it's a small white dog. Bless him. But don't ask me what kind of dog it is, I don't know and don't care. All dogs aren't the same, I know, but to actually name the brand of dog, I can't. Maybe they like to hang around me because I smell of shit? Or I smell of sausages? I don't know, but everywhere I go, they always follow me.

I used to be afraid of dogs, so that ain't it. Mum and Riana always say that they smell the fear, but I ain't afraid anymore. Only when they open their mouths and show me their teeth and growl. I don't like that. And I'll bite back. Ask Hayley, I bite like a dog..... Grom!

Me and Hayley having pets? I think Hayley agrees that she already has a pet...... ME!!!!!

It's Saturday....

and nearly christmas too. What am I talking about? It's still summer and I am talking about christmas? Random thoughts of the dutchman. Kill the easterbunny! Eat your iPhone! Yes, random things today.

I've just woken up, and still sleepy. It's still too hot inside here, sleeping isn't the nicest things to do right now. It's 24 degrees inside, and I've had the windows open for hours and hours, still not working. It's all shite. I wish I could live in....... I wanted to say England, but the weather is the same over there. I want to live somewhere cooler. North Pole! That's cool enough. Or Mars. Mars is a cool planet, isn't it? Or a hot planet? I can't remember, it's bloody far away and not interesting enough to remember.

Today I have got to go to a birthday. I want to stay in, but I've got too. I am a nice bloke, can't say no to someone. This is my day off, and I just want to walk around naked. Neh, not really. But I could, if I want too. It's nice to see some people, and there has been several babies been born, and I haven't seen them. So it's time to see them. Don't ask me why I haven't visited them before, because I didn't. No invitation for me, no drop by. I haven't even got a clue where they live, because they have never sended me their new address. Fuck it. I'll see them today.

Yes, I am weird. I don't visit anybody anymore, if they don't visit me. I give them a chance to visit me, and I obviously visit them, but if they don't visit me, fuck them. In the beginning I thought the flat was a disgrace, but it isn't. I thought I stunk, but that ain't it. I thought the place I live is a disgrace, but it isn't. So fuck you if you don't visit me. Bye bye then. Have a nice life.

I was thinking of a nice thing, we could organise a dunglish get together. If someone from the UK wants to visit the Netherlands, they can stay at our flat (it's Hayleys too). And they can visit the Netherlands, whilest knowing they having a place to stay. So if you want to stay here, you can! Come over and enjoy!

The big satelite is gone, no turk lives there anymore. Now there is a woman who I never see, or hear. She is even younger than me, but I think she does drugs. Strange woman, always having the curtains closed. Weird woman. Never mind. As long as she doesn't complain about the loudness of my music.

I am going to get off this chair, and do something productive. I'll catch you on the flipside!

The Weather Forecast....

do not believe it. I certainly don't anymore. What a bunch of twats. No point in believing them. They said we would have severe weather, possible a storm. But where was the storm? Not in Limburg where I live. They lied. They said "all over the Netherlands". What a bummer. Unbelievable. I could have slept with the windows open, let the cool air come in. But no, they said it was going to be heavy. Bunch of nutters. At work, we had to pull all beachflags down, and everything that could be affected by the wind. So all wobblers (poster holders) were kept in a safe place..... for no reason.

Yes, we had rain, but a tiny bit. And thunder, yes, but not as severe as they said. The local news channels website quoted "it passed Limburg". What a shit. Why? What do they do, those forecasters? Do they suck out of their big thumb? Why do we pay money for them to make up shit? Lazy bunch of twats. I hate it. They always exclude Limburg for some strange reason. I don't get it. I simply don't get it. Why do they do that? We are still part of the Netherlands. Come on people, we are! Don't exclude us, include us.

Don't make up the weather. Why say it's going to be bad everywhere, when it's clearly not? Maybe because they hate us? I don't know. But it's like the rest of the Netherlands don't want us to be part of it? That's a thing I really think is annoying. But we can look on the bright side!

They hate us so much, but we didn't have the bad weather. They should be jealous of us. We always have the highest temperatures and the best weather. Bunch of nutters, exclude us however you want, we always win. But us Limburgers should never pay any attention to the weather forecast, they lie!

The Summer has started yesterday.....

and it was hot. Unbelievablely hot. And at work, the airco is working super hard. Makes it all okay, but the biggest problem is, when you are inside a cold area, and walk into the blistering heat. OMG, it will make me ill. But the summer has started yesterday, and it will leave this country today. It will be severe weather here in the Netherlands, because I've just heared it on the news. And they think it will be, because they have already adjusted a lot of schedules. The train are going to drive with a special schedule, because of the thunder. So the weather we will be having later, is going to be heavy. Scary.

But for now, I've got to experience the shite weather. I am definately not a hot weather man. I am a cold temperature man. I don't like the heat. Bleh, give me miserable weather. Rain? Yes please. A lot of people don't appreciate it, I can understand. But the rain can be beautiful. You just need to see the beauty of it. Not constant rain tho, it would make me go bonkers too.

Or snow! I love the snow. Snow is beautiful. But we have to wait for long, to get better weather. Hope the summer ends quickly, I hate hot weather. SNOW, RAIN, give me it!

Yesterday was a .........

really bad day! I couldn't believe it. As you read, the day before was superb, but yesterday was so bad. I'll tell you why.

I went to bed at 12, and had a nice chat on the phone with Hayley, so I went to sleep at 1:30. But I wasn't feeling well, so I was happy that the toilet was really close to the bedroom. All of a sudden, at 3 o'clock, my colleague Ralph called my house phone, and he asked me if I could come and work on a early shift. The colleague who had to be doing the early shift couldn't make it. Her car got burned down: someone set it on fire. It happens alot in that area, so not a big surprise. But it was for me, because if I'd said yes, I could only sleep for an hour, no more. I said yes, went back to sleep, and woke up at 4.

If I work on a early shift, I need to wake up at 4. Because if I wake up any later, my rythm gets fucked. But it was already fucked. So I woke up, got ready for work, and drove off in my car. All of a sudden, not far away from my house, the car stuttered. And I thought "maybe it's because I am driving in the wrong gear". So I went a gear down, and drove further. A few seconds later, whilest attacking another corner, it did it again. Fuck. I hoped I could make it to work. I already messaged Ralph to let him know what the situation was. Imagine that, the second car that couldn't make it to work.

I got to work safely, but still scared. I went on the internet to see what the problem was. Millions of problems. Jeez. Not that easy to figure out what it is. But I will have a look at it later, don't have time for it now. But when I got to work, Ralph had already prepared a breakfast for me! Bless him!

I never eat in the morning, but I could use it! Thanks Ralph.
The rest of the day was long and boring. It got busier later, and I hoped that my colleague was early, so he could take over. When he came, we switched, and I went home. Once I got home, I went straight to bed..... the way to my bed was covered in clothing, I took them off while I was walking. But I couldn't stay in bed the whole time, because I am not a woodchuck. I slept for a bit, and then watched some telly, made a nice eggy thingy, and at 10, my bed was calling me.

And now I woke up. Ready for another day at the office. Hope my car is a bit better today. It was a good day in a way yesterday, I found money on the floor! Bills! So maybe it was temporary unluckyness? I don't know, I ain't God.

Hope you have a nice day, I wish mine would be better than yesterday!

This has been a good day!!!!

hope you had a nice day too. What have I done today? A lot of stuff. Not worth mentioning. But in general a good day. I know Hayley got me presents, so I am happy. And we are both going to a rave in Birmingham. Woohoo. I will bring a camera, we all must see Hayley rave! It's a must to see. Hayley and rave music? Weird combination. But it will happen. Hopefully it ain't sold out, but I doubt it.

It's going to be a wicked night. I can mention all their names (DJs and MCs) but no one would have a clue. But I know for sure that the artist that will perform there, are great. I don't know all names either, but I will tell you afterwards. Hopefully I can see my legends there: Scott Brown, Brisk, Gammer and Dougal, Joey Riot, Marc Smith, Al Storm and Breeze. It's good to see the scene still is huge. Now I hope I can get Hayley into a ravey costume. Can you imagine her raving? I can't. We have been to Ministry of Sound, but this is different. This is harder.

Harder, and tougher. I will take a shit load of paracetamols before entering, because my back is playing up every time I go to a rave. I can bore you with medical sentences, but I'm not. Just to say why I have a fucked up back, I had a scooter accident years ago, and I landed a bit wrong. And it fucked up my spine and pelvis. But I'm used to it.

We will be raving. Raving. She hasn't experienced me in my elements. Ministry of Sound was chilling, but this is energetic. Powerfull. Hard. Brutal. They don't take any prisoners. I hope she will survive the night. Unbelievable. It's going to be wicked. And it will be a good night too, see if I can get more people to join us. Maybe some old friends from Fantasy Island (a.k.a. Fanny Island). It would be a gathering.

Wow, I'm so excited. I told you, when I start talking about music, I can't stop. And I read some sad news today too. Kevin Energy, also a huge name in the Freeform world, is having a break. Why for Gods Sake? I've just started to discover his style, and now he leaves? Bummer. I am always late, I know. But it ain't possible to stay in the scene over here, it's hard to get your hands on UK Hardcore stuff. I know it's hard, but that's why I use the internet. But sometimes I don't see things passing by. And this was one of those moments. Meh. I am always late. When I was 12, I was still holding hands with my former girlfriend, whilest others where shagging their brains out. I was late.

Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I was born too early? I was just fed up staying inside. That is the reason. Thanks mum, for making me retarded!

Do I care? Nope. I'm going to a UK RAVE with my misses, and I can't wait. When we get closer to the event, I'll update you with boring stuff. You know me, eh?

It ain't easy....

to do things that you really want, but never done before. I wish it would be easier, but it ain't. I've tried so many things, so many ways. But it's hard. You don't have a clue what I am talking about? I'll tell you.

I'm going to do an interview, and it's hard. I am interviewing a DJ called DJ Brisk. And it ain't simple. Because this man is a legend, I don't know where to start. He has been in the industry for more than 20 years, so where do I start? And which style? I don't know, he is involved in literally every harder style. It's so damn hard. I wish it would be easier, but if it was, everybody could be a journalist. Imagine me being a journalist. I can't. But I want to do my best, and make it succesfull. I want this to succeed. I don't want to fabricate a shitty interview, I want it to be the best you have ever read. I don't like to fail. I don't like it at all. So I hope it will be alright. I'm planning to actually go to a rave, and see what the Brisk feeling is. He is in my eyes on of the best Hardcore/Rave DJ's I've ever heared, but I never had the chance to hear him live. I've got a lot of albums, where he contributed his tracks, but never heared him play live. I want too. Because he is a GOD! Yes he is. Lol. Imagine him reading this, he might think that I am a nutter. Sorry, but I am. A good nutter.

So this interview..... why him? Because he deserves it. And he is trying to get more bookings in the Netherlands, which could be easier for me to actually hear him play. But to get him over here, he needs to be known first. And this interview could be a step into the right direction. And you might never know, I could do that for a living! Not for Rolling Stone magazine, they are better journalists than me. And they typ a bit better. But why not give it a go?

I want to do so many things, and I will succeed. It will be a lot of tears and sweat, but it will be worth it. I'll upload the interview (when finished) onto here, and BookFace, and Twitter, etc. You get the idea. I hope you like it. I hope Brisk likes it. Lol. I hope it ain't bad.

Paul, if you read this, I'll do my best. And if it ain't the best you have ever seen, erm..... blame it on me being dutch! lol.

Ps. Paul, I am not this woman. Sorry.

I am laying in bed....

and wondering about my life here, I really want to go to the UK and make my dreams come true, but sadly, no one rich is reading my blog. I wish sometimes this would be read by someone famous, and they might think "hey, we really need this bloke". But it hasn't happened yet. Maybe one day.

One day I'll be in the UK. Don't know when, don't know where. I am really happy if it would be in London, or somewhere else would be nice as well. As long as it ain't over here, in saggy and shitty Netherlands. It's so boring here. Not my kind of dream. What are my dreams?

Being famous, for a start. An actor would be nice, but I am too ugly to be on telly, so I could become a writer. Obviously I've got loads of idea's in my head, and it's so hard to write about them. I need help. Or a famous DJ, like a lot of Dutch DJs are. But I want to be a good one. A life so far away from mine. I would be happy to just work in a studio, helping artist, but it's so damn hard to get a carreer starting, when you have the will, but not the experience they want.

Life stinks. Yes, it does. I haven't been to a fancy pantsy University, I ain't got millions to spend. I will be a Del Trotter, one day I will be a millionaire. And I will be one, and to be honoust, I think I should deserve it. Because I am nice. Yes. I am nice, so the money belongs to me. So ner.

How would a million pounds look like? Or smell? Or feel? I wanna swim in it, or on it. And for you, my fellow readers, I will share some money. You can get a few pounds, just because I am nice. Yes, that's me. I am like Ghandi, but with more hair and sexyness. A million pounds. Wow. A dream. Yes.

But maybe..... maybe one day!!!!!

And the winner is.....

me! I am not lying. I am really sorry for those who visit this blog every day, and hoped to be the 1500th visitor. I am sorry. I didn't wanted to be the winner, but it just happened.

So no prize for anybody. For me only. Ow, you don't know what I am talking about? I told on BookFace that the 1500th visitor would win a prize. And to be honoust, I would dedicate a blog entirely to him/her. But now it's going to be a blog about me. Sorry for that.

But to be nice too, ain't you all winners every day? You get to read a cool and weird blog, written by me! Isn't that awarding enough?

Let's talk about BookFace. It's been annoying the last couple of days. People keep using some apps, where you can vote for your friends position, or you can answer question about them. And the person you answered about, has to go to that app, answer a few questions too, and then it reveils the answers others gave. I don't want too. I know some people ain't my closest friends. I know I ain't the sexiest person alive. I wouldn't stand a chance against Colin Firth, Leonardo Di Caprisun, or whoever your sexiest person is. So why would I go and have a look on their app? I don't. I tried it once, but got annoyed.

Another annoying thing about BookFace is the fact that it ain't fair. Imagine a life without BookFace? I can't. And thank God it hasn't been offline recently. I would go nuts. But the BookFace app for my Blackberry is shit. Absolutely shit. Can't believe it. Hyves is shit too. Twitter is shit too. Why?

If I go on BookFace for Blackberry, and I go to my inbox, all of a sudden, I get all those unread messages which I already have deleted from my computer. Sometimes it's just a few, but sometimes hundreds. It's not always up to date with stuff like that. And it keeps deleting pokes. Twitter does the same bullshit. Keeps blocking and deleting people. And I always loose alot of tweets. How come? I don't know. Complete failure.

The most weirdest thing that can happen, is BookFace being offline. That would disrupt the whole world. What will we do? Rob ain't sharing his opinion of the government, Tami not able to talk about the love of her life (nope, it ain't me), Hayley not being able to talk about her sex machine, etc. And I couldn't violate your eyes with my writings. It's pure eye porn. Wow, never thought that I would write something crazy like this. Eye porn. Hahahaha. You see? I do polute the internet with my jibber jabber. Should I stop?

No I'm not going to stop. I will never stop. Quiting is for losers. And I know I am one, but I ain't going to quite. I am strong enough to survive. I hope.

Eye porn. Hahahahahaha. I am truly a crazy dutchman.

WIFI sucks....

I don't have a clue how it works. I know it's wireless, but why do I need so many cables? I am already happy because of the fact that I received a new modem. My old modem was a bit..... erm...... fucked. I couldn't touch it at all, move it....no! The power cable was cut in half, because of my stupidity. My father combined those cables with a tire wrap. And because I needed to move from one room to another, I needed to have all those cables loose. So I tried to cut through the tie wrap. It wasn't a success. Power going through my arse, and having a fucked up modem. What a bummer. I tried to get a new power cable, and asked the provider if they had one spare. They didn't. So I couldn't hoover behind all those cables without loosing it all. But now I do have it, and I don't get it at all.

And now, hours later, it is working. Finally. I am happy, because now I can go online without sitting behind my computer desk. I can sit in my garden, if I had one. Wifi is great, if you know how it works. The biggest problem whilest installing it, was connecting the modem to my computer. I took out the LAN cable and thought that it would work. But you don't get wireless internet if your computer doesn't have a wireless card thingy. My computer isn't wireless. Nearly took all the wires away. Thank God I didn't. Would have looked like a tit.

But now my digital TV ain't working. It says "scrambled programme". I don't like scrabble, and scrambled programmes either. I wish I could watch it now. But my sister will fix it on friday, she works for my internet provider. Lucky me, eh?

What else have I been doing today? Nothing much. The Wifi connecting took hours, because I've done stuff wrong. And I hate that. Ow, I ordered a pizza. And I've listened to an old Next Generation Podcast. DJ Brisk and Fracus, they are heroes. Heroes in my book. They keep the spirit alive. Wish I could have the honour to meet those two fabulous men. But sadly enough, they live in the wrong country. They have provided me (and Hayley) with alot of fun. They have got proper comedy skills. If you are wondering what I am talking about, go to nextgenerationrecords.co.uk and check it out!

I am signing out. Because I am bored. And still need to fold my clothes. Bummer. I need a maid. Help!

The Dentist....

I don't like the man. Well, not personally. But I hate his job. My dentist is really a nice guy. I went there yesterday to get a filling, and he always makes time for a nice chat.

But he wanted to use a syringe, to numb my face. Sorry matey, no way. I don't like syringes. I'd rather suffer the pain and agony. When he first helped me with a temporary filling, he had to use a syringe, because he said "this is really painfull without anaesthesia". Because my nerve inside my teeth was visible. Normally they are covered, but the hole was so big, he could see and touch it. When he touched it the first time, I nearly passed out. So anaesthesia. But not yesterday. Wish I did it. My God, I really passed out. He started with the first bit of the filling, and he had to push it in really hard, and by doing that, he touched the nerve. And he had to do that 3 times! But he was gentle with me, he warned me before he did it. I was happy, but not ready for so much pain. 

But why is it, that you never see ugly assistents? The woman standing beside him all the time yesterday, she was a nice woman. She monitored my breathing all the time, and when I was in pain, she reminded me to breathe. She didn't wanted me to be the first to die in his seat! Imagine that. Dead in a dentist seat. "How did your husband die?" "Ow, he went to the dentist!" Hahaha.

I hate it, when I have my mouth wide open, and saliva keeps dripping down the side of your mouth cheeks. Bleh. I am embarrassed every time that happens. But I can't help it, he has got his hands and tools inside of my mouth, and she is using some kind of sucking device, to pick up teeth debris.

Am I the only one who sits in the dentist chair, and thinks "I need to move my hands or feet, just to let them see I am alright, that I am strong enough for the pain?" I always think that. But I hate it when my arm of foot gets numb too, because I've been on his chair too long. And one other thing, when the chair is straight up, and you sit down, they always lower the chair, for him to do his job properly. Am I the only one who always thinks that I will slide of the chair? Stupid chairs.

Why do I always wonder about stupid things? Who does the dentists teeth, when he is in pain? His son! But would his son be a proper dentist, and charge him too? I doubt it. When I need to refuel, I don't get any discount at all. Cheeky sods. I need to go to work.

Hope you have a good day, and if you have a dentist appointment today, or soon, just go! Make sure your teeth are alright! Don't be a numbnut and let your teeth go to waste.

Happy Fathersday!!!

It's that day again. Fathersday. And my father ain't here. He is somewhere in China, I would say working, but I don't think he is. It's sunday, and it's fathersday, he is obviously not working. He is celebrating!

I've just emailed him back, I can't call him, don't know how! China, pfew, that's far away. Don't know the landcode of China. I don't know his number too. Lol. I could call his dutch number, but his credit will be going quickly. Hope he comes back quickly, before he turns into a dunees. A dunese? A Dutch-Chinese.

He messaged me earlier, that he reads my blogs. I don't know if he did it on Hyves or on here. But it was a nice message. Thank you, paps. This blog is dedicated to you! I don't know what to write about tho. I did that before, so why do it again?? I know, it's fathersday. I should.

I should? I must. And I should give him his CDs back, which I borrowed 10 years ago, and never returned to him. I don't know if he wants to see the state of them. They are a bit kaput. Not completely broken, but a bit kaput. Some tracks are just not playable. Sorry pops.

My dad is a legend. He is. You know that. He is my legend! I am not religious, so God ain't my hero. My dad is. Without a doubt. He can fix everything. I can imagine him, standing at the gates of heaven, and when they open, they creak. And he will be the man fixing the gates. He is such a handy man. Unbelievable. He can fix everything.

I can tell you a story, which I must have said before. My dad is a cool person, but sometimes a bastard. Yes he is. Well. to be precise, he was. When I was young and lived with my parents, I was a naughty boy. As I quoted yesterday, I am addicted to music. And I always played it out loud. Mum would always shout, whilest standing downstairs. She would shout "turn the music down right now, I am not going to say it again". But I would never listen to it. And then, my dad would get off his seat, and walk into my bedroom with a scissor. He wouldn't say a word, and just cut through the cables of the speakers. That is my dad. Nope, that was my dad. He ain't going to do that right now, it's my flat.

But the funny side of this was, that everytime he would do that, I would ask him with my puppy eyes to make it again, to fix it. And he would do that. And I always promised I would never do it again. I don't know how many times the wires got cut. And he welded them back together. I love you paps.

Cool dads rule the world. And my dad is definately one of the coolest. But please come back quickly, don't stay there too long, you might miss the dutch food. And me! No dad, there is nothing to be fixed, if so, I wouldn't say it to you. Have a nice day, and see you soon paps.