The end of the world is ......

near. According to messages I've been reading. It's near, ladies and gentlemen. We are going to die. Wow, that sounds weird. It is this saturday, so make sure you do something with your life. Don't sit behind the computer, go crazy. Walk around naked down your street! Sleep with anybody! I don't care, just go bonkers! And when the police wants to arrest you, just say that it ain't your fault, because the end is near, and why bother about the rest of the world? Maybe you can get away with it (I doubt it). But give it a go. And let me know. I want to know what the world does!

Maybe planking? WTF is that? That is just dumb, and a bit funny. Laying somewhere like a plank and take a picture of it? Don't see the humour in this, a lot of people lay like that every day in a hospital. Like a plank. Is that the most exciting thing the world has got to offer? Laying like a plank? My God, maybe it is good that the world ends a.s.a.p. because we are a failure. Laying like a plank. Yep, an achievement. Let's all lay like planks. Come on. Let's do it. Let's turn into complete morons! Woop. Plank like you have never done before!

Yes I am taking the mickey! I lay like a plank every day in bed, for hours and hours! That's what I do. My dad calls me a woodchuck, or a marmot (both are the same, but maybe where you are from, it could be called differently). I am a woodchuck. If there is a world record to be beaten, and if it is about sleeping the longest, I would win. A woodchuck. To be honoust, in dutch the word is marmot, and I had to look it up. Like I would know that the english name for it is woodchuck, lol. I am really bad when it comes to animals. I don't know their names. And I don't mean like "Dave" or "Lizzy" but the animal names. To explain what they are, which typ, which breed. You get my idea.

Let's get back to the end of the world. It's saturday. Shit, I need to work then. I will die in uniform. Grrr. Why? Why not.....erm...... any other day, when I am not at work. I can imagine what my last words will be:

"you have number 4? that's 44.29 euro. yes you can....................BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM"

The Boom bit means obviously the end. Where will you be when it is going to happen? I still can't believe it. I always thought it would happen on 11-11-11 at 11:11. Not really tho, you can not think and act like God. We ain't God, and we don't make decisions like he can. He will decide which day, not us human beings. And why would he? He would be a weird God, letting his creations die like that. Vanish into thin air. The thing he created from someone's rib. I was probably made of a woodchucks rib. Obvious. But why would God do that? He wouldn't be that stupid, would he?

It is true, we have been walking this earth for thousands of years. And what did we achieve? F**k all. We destroyed Mother Nature. We gained land for our own benefit. We are a greedy kind of species. All about us. Not caring about others. The second Adam or Eve at from the apple or banana, it all went wrong. By the way, I'm not discriminating the gay population. I'll include them in this blog too. Instead of Adam and Eve, it would have been Adam and Steve. But how did we repopulate? Never mind!

We have achieved alot, but nothing really interesting. If you believe in aliens and all that, you must agree that they have done alot more than us, silly people. They can fly through hyperspace. What can we do? Mach 2? We can go to the moon, that's all. They have concured space and time. What did we do? Go to the f**king moon, the most deadliest place. We went there. We made the Eiffeltower. We created a sheep called Dolly. We have.......... done f**k all. Come on people. We gave God a good reason to destroy us.

The end of the world? My arse. It's not this saturday, and not 11-11-11. Why not? The end of the world was when us humankind took over this planet. We all died then. We are robots.

Btw, think about a certain thing today. What will happen when you die? Where do you go? Where does your thoughts go to? What will we experience? I love thinking about the unthinkable. It's juice for my brain. Brains in hypermode, that's the only thing we can achieve. Thank you, Redbull!

I knew I wrote a blog yesterday about me and music. I'll typ part 2 next time, probably after saturday. No need to do it now, if the world ends. If it doesn't, come back to this page. Bookmark it, share it. Place comments. Do wild things. I care. Let me know what you think! You know I am talking about YOU! Yes, YOU, sitting in that chair. You have come here for a reason. And thank you for visiting.

If it is the end on saturday, it was nice to know you all. I'll catch you on the flipside!

Nice picture? I think so. It proves another thing. As I can see, it falls on Russia. So we still have 1 percent to live! We can hide underneath a rock. Meh. Like I care!

Me and Music (part 1)

are friends. Good friends. I told you several blogs ago, that I would typ my musical history. And now I will do that. Music history, not the musical stuff as in theatre. But let's get back to reality first.

Hello to you. Enough of the welcome sh*t. Ok, are you ready? Really?

27 years ago, my mum pooped me out. Not my fault, my dad wanted some jiggy jiggy time with mum, and voila, there I was. When I grew up, you had MTV, but no other music channels. And obviously the radio. But the radio wasn't that important to me at that moment. It was my parents who made me listen to some artists/bands. I grew up with the sound of Queen, Abba, Barry White, etc. A lot of Motown music aswell. My dad used to listen to lame rock music, I'm not going to mention it here, it's embarrassing.

My mum is a big Queen fan. She went to their concert in Rotterdam, I think? Or somewhere else. She still has all the LPs. And she knows all the songs. Back in those days, LPs were the only thing for us. There are alot of picture's of me listening to an LP with a MASSIVE headphone on. It was cool, back in the 80s. We were a new generation, coming up. The music style changed, more rough and tougher. The music industry had realised that we wanted more, and harder.

My dad was a Techno fan. He bought "Turn up the Bass" cd's. Before you ask me, he was fan of a band called "the Sweet". Okay, enough embarrasment. Turn up the Bass. It was all new to me, I was still a tiny boy. And I was so proud of my first stereo they bought me. It had a radio, and cassette player. Wow! I was cool, all of a sudden. But jealous of all those people who had a CD player. I didn't have one. Not even a CD player (the one you carry around). I knew one friend of the family, who always bought CD's. His name is Dave. He was more into the harder stuff. I was still processing the 80s.

So one day I went to him, with a cassette, and asked him, if he could put some nice tunes on it. He just bought a new "House Party" CD, which he thought would be good for me. I was alright with that. I walked around with my cassette player and massive headphones, OMG I was cool. No one could disturb me, I was in my own world. I was hip! Supadupacool. Nice House tunes everyday. And every month (I think) they released a new compilation. So I went to Dave, and he did it several times. But one day he said "I've got House Party 8, and I don't know if I would put it on your cassette!" I was wondering, why wouldn't he? I has been good so far, have they changed it? And yes they did. It was a Hardcore CD. Hardcore? What's that? "Okay mate, put it on, if I don't like it, I will come back next week for other music."

I was on the bus, and I put the cassette in. Volume nearly to the max. And then.......... BOOM BOOM BOOM FUCK FUCK BOOM BOOM BOOM!!!!!! I thought I broke my cassette player, this ain't music? What's this? The F- word? OMG. This is weird!!!! I tried turning the cassette around, see if the other side was the same. And it was, maybe even harder. Bugger. If this is Hardcore, it's shit! Or isn't it? Let's just listen to it. The bass is wicked........ Meh. Just give it a shot.

And I got addicted to it! I can still remember I was at school, and me and two other classmates had a presentation about Rave music, because back in the days, it was Hardcore or Rave. I couldn't define it like I can right now. We made the classroom listen to it. I don't know and don't think we got graded for it. Imagine that everybody was into Pop music, and not other styles. Maybe House, but that was the hardest they would go. And there were two plonkers, who listened to a Bass related style. Amazing.

More people got addicted to it, you could hear it back on the radio, or on television. It was booming business in NL. Everybody wanted a piece of it. You have to remind yourself, that there were people who wanted to listen to a certain style which didn't made them an individual. But back in the days, if you listened to it, you were. But the scene grew fast, and you became a gabber (pal). A gabber was a person who listened to Rave music. But not with the distinctive looks. They came later.

Mum forbid the music. It was devilish music, no good and descent person would listen to it! If she would find something related to it, she would destroy it! So, when the first cassettes came out (Thunderdome) I had to hide them in my closet. Because I knew that my mum wasn't talking bollocks! She would destroy them. More and more I got into it. But I was still listening to cassettes, not CDs. But that would change.

My first single was "James Brown is Dead" by L.A. Style. And my first compilation was "Yabba Dabba Dance volume 1". And one day, mum and dad bought me a CD player! Not a carriable one, one for my stereo set! OMG I was happy. I borrowed all my dads "Turn up the Bass" CDs and danced in my bedroom. To be honoust, I never gave them back, I still have them! Sorry dad.

Back in those days, my family was a member of a certain book store chain. You could buy books and CDs cheaper, but you needed to buy every month. So once a month we went to that store, and every month they sold shit. But then my eyes were pleasured: "Mysteryland 1994". I saw it, and wanted it. But I never forgot what my mum said to me about Thunderdome cassettes/CDs. But this was a compilation, the first disc was Thunderdome, second The House of Love, and the third The Eclipse. I hoped my mum wouldn't notice. AND SHE DIDN'T! Wooohooo! Yes. My first Hardcore CD! I gave my mum my pocket money, and there we went.............with a "forbidden" CD!!!!! I tricked her!

Back at home, always the headphones on! She wasn't allowed to hear it! I hoped she wouldn't find out! Because that would have ment: CD in the bin! So I listened to it always with the headphones on. I knew my parents weren't bullshitting. Because, whenever I would put the music on too loud, my mum would warn me once, and then dad would walk upstairs with a scissor, and cut the cables of the speakers in two. So they would mean it!

After all these years, I still have the CD. It doesn't play like back in the days, because there are more scratches on it, more then expected. But I had it, and was proud. My CD collection grew every month. More Dance music. I got hooked on it. The biggest label was Arcade, and I always bought CDs from their label, because I thought it was the best label with the best music. If I think back, I know I bought a lot of shit, wasted money.

But one day, when my cassette player was broken, I asked my parents to record "Mysteryland" onto a cassette. And they did. But their player had a malfunction. You could only record it, with the volume maxed out. I went upstairs, forgot about the max volume. I was in my bedroom, when I heared "BOOM BOOM DJ FUCK BOOM BOOM". I knew I would get killed. Stabbed? Maybe. Something would happen, because the whole street was enjoying the beats. The whole street? I think they could hear it in Germany, it was so loud. I walked down, with wet underpants, and I saw my mum and dad looking at me. And I knew, that this was it. The end. But then my dad did something which astonished me................................

He started RAVING! Not that he knew how to. But he tried. And mum said "this is the only CD that you are allowed to have". Pfew. I got away, I was lucky. Jesus, thank you. But that would change tho. A few month later, she found my secret stash, my Hardcore cassettes. And she made me destroy them one by one! How cruel is that? I cried my eyes out. I didn't want to destroy them. "Please mum, this ain't Hardcore, this is Happy!" The longest day in my life! Pain! Yes.

But parents can be persuaded. And they did. The music scene changed, Hardcore got more accepted. And she said to me one day, that she could forbid it for the rest of my life, but it wouldn't make any sense, because I am stubborn (I already replaced the emptyness in my wardrobe). So she would accept it, as long as she wouldn't hear it. You can imagine that my speaker cables got cut several times.

When they were cut, I always looked at my dad with my sad face, and he welded them together again. I never learned! Lol. I still play it out loud. F**k the world! Hahahahaha.

In the year 1998, I got more addicted to it, but still was underaged to go to a rave. I went to a school disco (yeah, wow, exciting..... NOT). I wanted to become a raver, a gabber. No Nikes tho, I wasn't allowed. But 1998 would change my life. My classmates all said they would go to Mysteryland, the actual party! I tried to persuade my mum, I needed to go! I think I still owe them a month, washing up. Lol. It took me days to make my mum say yes, and the day she did it, I went immediately to the record store in Heerlen, called Satisfaction. I bought a ticket, and I was again the happiest boy in the world. But when I got home, I read the back of the ticket, and it said "minimum age of 18". Ow shit, I am 16. I can be refushed entry. And then what? I had to wait outside? Bollocks, I don't want that. Sod that.

I was brave, but pooped myself in the bus. Not actually. Imagine that. I was afraid. This girl who was sitting next to me, I can still remember her. Big tits, yes, she had them. And she asked me if I wanted some smart drugs! My reply? "Nah, thanks, I just had a pill". Pfew, got out of it easily! Now I just needed to get into the rave. Just me, no one else. NONE OF MY CLASSMATES WENT. I waited at the busstop for them, but they were full of shit. I was the only one! That made the whole situation 100 times worst. I got at the entrance of Mysteryland, and hoped my mums eyeliner would help me (you know, the pencil which you use to colour the eyelashes). I drew a moustache, just to make me look older. My cap was hanging over my eyes, to hide my age. And then..................... I GOT IN!

There were 25000 ravers, plus me! Exciting! Woohoo. I had the time of my life. More raves would follow, but this was the most memorable one. The first one, no virgin anymore!

You can imagine I was really upset and angry at my classmates. F**king fake wannabee's. I went, you didn't. Loser. So ner!

I'm going to finish now, because my fingers are hurt. Next blog will be the era after 1998. Thank you for reading it. Hope it made sense!

This ain't my bus btw. But just to give you a clue how it went on those days!

How should I start this?

Should I say F**k it? That would be weird to start my blog with! It's a track lyric. Well, getting back to reality. How are you doing? I'm fine. Last night was a good night for Twitter, or a bad one? I've been tweeting my arse off. More than 200 tweets in 2 days. Wow, amazing. And I am starting right now again. Why you might think? Because I am bored. It used to be funny on Facebook, but it ain't anymore. It has changed alot. Not alot of people are interacting anymore. They go on it all about theatre and shit, I am not into that. So that's me excluded.

But I am not bored. Got a lot to do online. Writing this blog for you. I had a reader from Germany, India, America, England. Maybe more countries, but I don't know now, and I'm not going to check it, because I will loose everything I typed. So I'll say hello to you!

Sorry, I had to do a number 1 and 2. And get new ciggie's, ran out. I could chat about my poop, but you are not interested, I might guess? What else have I done? Ow yeah, got a new cup of coffee. Senseo coffee all the way. The best coffee, besides Tchibo. That was good coffee. But I stopped drinking it, because we changed machines at work. Now it's Douwe Egberts. And I don't mind. Imagine working a nightshift without coffee? That would be like living in hell, I think?

I hope tonight's nightshift goes better. Last night was utter crap. Boring. Nothing much to do. As I said yesterday, I went an hour earlier for my colleague. He wanted to go to a football match, where his team could become champion. They didn't. Standard Luik lost. How funny is that? He could have stayed at work. But I am a good colleague, so I said "just go". He will do an extra hour today for me, so I will start at 11 tonight. An hour shorter doesn't make it acceptable. Because it will be shit. Long hours without anything to do.

In a nightshift you always get the people who have lived with a formula. D+D=A. Dumb + Drunk = Arsehole. Yes, they are everywhere. Must have lost a lot of their braincells, because they talk like rubbish. Unbelievable. They annoy me. Alot! Because they always enter the shop when I just finished mopping. I wish I could have a nightshift with normal people! Please GOD, let ASDA sell time machine's so I could go back in time, 3 days back. Because I had the perfect nightshift then. The A2 was closed and I could do all my work without being disturbed. I loved it. Hope tonight will be good aswell!

What do I miss during a nightshift? A computer. Yes I do. Wish I had one, which could keep me entertained. I miss music. I know I have my Blackberry with me, but sometimes you read on Twitter that a certain show is starting, and I always hate it for me not listening to it. (Does this make sense?).

Bleh, enough about the nightshift. Anal lubrication. Now that's a thing.....erm..... I can't talk about. How did that come in my head? Must be the little devil on my right. GET OFF MY SHOULDER. NOW! Leave me alone. I want to be an angel, and not talk rubbish! Yes I know it's hard.

If you read any of my blogs or tweets or messages on Facebook, and you get offended, I am sorry. Didn't mean it. I had a conversation with someone last night about useage of the word "retard". Well, I can go on for hours, but I messaged him/her by DM, and said "if a retard says someone else is retarded, is that allowed?" Because I know I am a retard. You know it too. Read my blogs for god sake! Aren't I a retard? I rest my case.

Oooopppssss, nearly no picture! Let's see.

Yes, two picture's from me when I was at school. I used to learn infrastructure. But I failed by one tenth of a point. Stupid school. But I am older and wiser now, I hope? (NEVER)

As you can see....

I've updated the site a bit. A twitter thingy on your right, how cool is that? More needs and feeds for you! I was on a twitter mode last night, OMD. Not normal. So many tweets were flying around the world wide web. I was on a roll. A good one tho. I liked it. My followers probably didn't. But do I care? Lol. I was on a moot mode last night. And this night I think the same will happen. Those nightshifts are boring, so f**king boring.

Hopefully I don't get cramp in my foot again. That was horrible. Never again. It hurt like hell, and it ain't comfortable when you have a walking job, you know. When you walk alot. It was so quiet last night, bleh. Can't help myself. I've finished everything really on time, but I had other things to do..... sitting around picking my nose and shooting bogeys. YES I WAS BORED.

The weather is looking alright. But hopefully it will rain tonight, so I can read my book. If I don't forget to bring it with me. I've got to start an hour earlier, for Ralph. He wants to go to some football match, some belgium match. I don't have a clue what team. Honoustly, I don't have a clue how football works. I know they have to score between 3 metal poles, but that's it. (I am not being racist, I ment poles as in....erm.... not the polish people from Poland!)

Alot of people have tried to explain it to me. But I'm not caring. I'm bored when watching football. You can ask Hayley, I am annoying while watching it! I always take the piss. That's me! Pisstaker. Do I need a piss right now? Nope! Thank GOD!

What do I need to say? Don't know anything. Erm... maybe about something I really don't like. Comedy Central has those "Roast of..." shows. They are horrible. I've never seen anything that horrible. Apart from Snoop Dogg, the other "comedians" I've never heared of in my life. Lisa Lampenelli (or however you spell it) is negro cock addicted? Is that really necessary to point out? Really funny, yep. NOT. And they always roast a second hand artist/actor. In the United States they are B-actors/artists. But the comedians are B too. What a waste of my time! I've watched the Roast of Donald Trump. That man is so lame, and dumb. Donald Dumb, much better name that suits him. Americans, please come with something entertaining. Something like "Friends" or "Will and Grace" or "Family Guy" or "The Simpsons", etc. Please do not make shows which will make Stephen Fry loose his mind. He is all about intelligence, and those shows aren't. (Just between you and me, the shows I named two lines ago do not have alot of intelligence in it either, but do have a certain message in each episode).

Stephen Fry is a f**king legend. YES HE IS. He is the king of knowledge. Well, in my eyes. How can he know so much? He is well spoken. Not my type when it comes to the looks, but hey, I'm not gay. Every time he comes on air, he just amazes me. Who else is a legend? Mistajam! He is the best radio DJ in the world. So humouristic. Always bringing the world the best beats. And did I say hilarious? I say it again. Stephen is hilarious too, but in a gentle way. I love the bits where he goes ballistic. Go on Youtube and find episodes of QI. You can do it!

You might think, why doesn't he name a dutch person? Because they are crap. Dutch radio presenters always talk through records all the time, never play long versions, always take the piss, are racists (some of them are). I don't like the radio nowadays. The only radio channel I listen to is radio 1. The news channel. The best there is. What about TV then? Dutch TV is shite. Come over here and watch it yourself. Or get a big satellite in your back garden and watch it from where-ever you are. It's shit. Nothing funny. Times have changed.

Let's honour the man who's knowledge can be usefull for aliens. They shouldn't probe stupid Americans (also known as Rednecks, I think?). They should probe him. His knowledge blows everybody away. Imagine that. Stephen Fry getting probed. He wouldn't mind hahahahahahaha. But all jokes aside, he is the king of knowledge. And for that, we salute you!

There is only one thing bad about Stephen Fry.......he has a Iphone. A bloody Iphone. Grrr. He should come to the BB community! But every person has it flaws. Stephen Fry is a legend. No matter what he says or does. STEPHEN FRY FOR PRESIDENT! OR KING. Whatever rocks your boat!

Another day, same shit....

no, that's not how it should be. Same shit, different day! That's it. Meh, can't be arsed to change it. The TAB button don't like me now. So I'll leave her alone.

How are you doing? I'm fine. This morning I wasn't. Went to bed and had to wake up early, for the dentist. I wasn't excited to go there. He did a filling, in a super horrible place. You know your front teeth, the one's you see when you are smiling? One of them. And not from the back or underneath, but up front! You could see the bloody big gap in it, when he drilled it! The filling up took so f**king long, I was in agony.

But that is done, for now. Need to go back in August, if I don't forget. I know my brain. So, I have it written down somewhere, now I need a day off. At work obviously. Bleh, don't want to go. I know it's far away, but I don't want to go.

What else has happened? Nothing much, I was at work last night, and from 22:00 till 03:30 there was no customer. Because they were working on the A2. They were finishing a bridge for animals to cross over. Can you believe that? Some roads are still completely ruined after the frost, and still not rebuilded, but they build a bridge for animals? The world is going nuts. A bridge..... for animals? I care about animals too, but that is just taking the piss. How much money is it costing us? When will animals pay us back, mm? Come on squirrels, birds, cows. Start paying hard cash, not milk, nuts or other materials. We need money. The world is poor. Yes, we are. Have you heared how high the depth is in the USA? 14.29 trillion dollars! WTF?

That's a lot of money! I wish I had one percent of it! Trillion? My god. Ridicilous. I know it sounds absurd, but the americans should blame themselves too (sorry Tami). They have several mortgages, several loans, several creditcards, etc. But no money. 1 christmas tree? F**k that, we need 4. We are americans! What the hell? You don't have money, stop spending other people's money.

I can understand that the USA needed the money, for whenever a disaster happens. Like hurricane Katrina, or an earthquake, or the flooding of...erm... somewhere. It's going mad. Now several people want to stop sending money to the poor people in Pakistan, where Osama has lived for several years, before he got killed. Why stop? They haven't done a thing wrong! They are the one's who need the money. They depend on money, to get food, to make food, or to put it this way: to survive!

I've heared a story on the radio this morning whilest driving to my crib, and it was about a village in Pakistan. They had everything on documents, and it said that the USA had sended 5000 dollars to that village. They were so clever, they still haven't spend it all. They have 2000 dollars still untouched. Isn't that amazing? They have nothing, but still managed to not spend it all! Those people who are desperate for money, they need it. Not americans who just spend it because they can. They want to work for it, and in the long term, they will earn it back. They can produce food for themselves after a while, after buying stuff to make...erm... a field full of food? Machine's!

Please, people from the USA, don't be greedy like that! The world depends on you. The third world I mean. They need your money. Don't spend it on bullshit, spend it on usefull things. I simply don't get it.

I don't get it. The world has a lot to spare, but doesn't. How many celebrities do actually spend their money? I can not believe that all the actors and musicians who went to poor places in the world, for Comic Relief or something else, had to pay for their own ticket. They travel in style, just to see poor people, and ask poor people in the UK, USA, NL, to spend their money. Isn't it weird? Not that I am against donating money!

You don't hear me saying it. But think closely before you send the money next time! They might say they do stuff without charging money for it. But do they really? Do they BOLLOCKS! If I were a celeb and had the money, I would do it differently!

Do you think the BBC would have such a large TV show/programme without getting money for it? Camera's will not record, if you would ask it gently. It's need power. It need people controlling it. It's all a vicious circle.

I give money to one charity, and no other. The salvation army! Those are the true heroes! When it's minus 10, they are handing out food to the poor people of our own country. When it's christmas, and we all sit around the fire, they are helping the people who need it. The people who sleep, live and die on the streets. And the amount of people on the street will only increase, if people spend their money, when it ain't even their money. So people, don't spend if you don't own it!

Ps. God, does this mean that I get a place in heaven? I wrote a nice blog! I have a heart! Please, give me a seat! I don't want to go to hell, I hate the heat. I love the coolness! Please? More blogs? Okay, but not today!

Wow, I'm on a mission today....

to spread nonsense on the web. I'm actually amazed that the viewers can understand what I am typing, because I am foreign to you. Not to me, I am dutch! How can I be foreign when I am in Dutchland right now? To give you an idea where I live: I live literally 2 minutes from the German border. I can smell the bratwurst when I open my window. I can hear Pinkpop every year, when I am actually at home! I live in the south of the Netherlands. There you go, topography! Always interesting to let you know. And now you can tell your friends that you know a bit about a certain dutchman.

You want to know more? Erm.... my ATM card number a.k.a. Pin number is....... hahahahahahaha. Like I would tell you that! I am stupid, but not that stupid! What was my Pin code again? Shit, I forgot! Erm. Erm. Bugger, what was it again? Never mind, I will know it in a minute. But still not sharing it with you!

What can I chat about now? Maybe a bit more about me? You want that?

I was born a long time ago. Last century! Hehehe. Makes me look so old. I was born in 1983, to be precise on the 31st of August. My mum pooped me out. She was fed up of having something giving her food cravings. So she pooped me out, way too early. I was too lightweighted.... you know..... I was skinny. I think 2 months too early, she pooped me out. And I was born cross-eyed. Yep, that was me. All my mums fault. I had surgery on that eye, but still I can feel that it didn't had the effect it should have had. I still look cross-eyed when I am tired. And when I am drunk. But hey, I don't get drunk too often.

My mother is a bit coloured. My father is white as a sheet. And I am a mix. A mix of roots. My fathers family is from the Netherlands, and my mothers from Indonesia. I have told you that, didn't I? Bugger. Ow, something I can share is this: when the sun comes out, I get tanned. I just need to smell the sun, and get a colour. Thanks mum. But I am not a tanning guy. I don't like it to lay on sand, waiting for me to turn into another colour. And I don't like bugs either. They always come fly around me, or crawl around me. Leave me alone, bugs. My face maybe coloured, and my arms too, but my belly is white, and my legs are milk bottles.

Any other news I can share? My father builds rollercoasters, all around the world. That's what he does. Interesting? Yes! I can get theme park tickets for free! Woohoo! My father is a true hero. A legend in my eyes. So relaxed, and so cool. He recently had an accident, but recovered quick. He is a true man. He can fix everything. He made his own garage! He fixes his own car. He has got so many tools, he could start his own garage. He is so clever: that's my dad! I wish I could have his fearlessness. I am afraid of heights. He ain't. He is a bloke, a die hard bloke. He could teach Arnold Schwarzenegger a lesson! He is the Terminator, my dad. He has been to so many countries around the world, I envy him. But that ment that he wasn't always at home when me and my sister were growing up. That's the down side.

Let's see if we got a nice family picture:

My mum and dad, whilest watching the football match. Obviously in the local pub, they are addicted to that pub for some strange reason. I am not like that. They simply don't give a fuck! That's my family. I haven't got a picture which includes the whole family. Always someone out of the picture. Maybe a good idea to do that sooner or later, a family portret!

Any other news to share? I am.... dutch? You know that already. Got nothing to report now. I'll get back to you later, after I've done the dishes and have eaten. Bye bye!

Let me tell you something.....

I don't like today and tomorrow. I don't like it. I have to go on a nightshift, whilest they are working on the A2 and the shop is closed. I don't like it. I'll be all on my own. And I have to wake up goddamn early, because of my dentist appointment. Bleh. But I've got to go. My teeth look like Quasimodo's teeth, all fucked up. Oops, sorry. I'll rephrase that. My teeth are f**ked up!

And how weird is that? I've just called my parents, because I knew they had an dentist appointment tomorrow too, at the same dentist. But I didn't knew when. But now I know. They go in at 3, I go at 3:15! How funny is that! I see them again tomorrow lol.

But it ain't tomorrow yet. It is today, and I hope it will be a good day! What should I do today?? What should I write today?? Let me think for a second.

I SAID A SECOND! I'M STILL THINKING!!!!

I'll talk about my history. My England History! Maybe you want to know, how I get to know England so well. It started a few years ago, when my dad asked me if I wanted a workholiday. He knew that Fantasy Island in Skegness were looking for staff, because he builded two rollercoasters there, the Millenium and the KitKat Oddesy. So that's how he knew. I thought about it for a second, and said yes! Why wouldn't I? It would be an experience. So I went there, without having a clue what I was going to do. I didn't knew where I was going to stay etc. I stayed at someone's trailer, but got kicked out, because I took some girls to the trailer after 12 o'clock at night, which wasn't allowed. I stayed at someone's house, which was cool too! I quickly got a name around there, and they gave me the name Joey. Joey you might think, is completely different if you compare it to my real name. I'll tell you why!

I used to work at a trainstation in the South of Limburg, and someone said there that I looked like Jerry Lee Lewis, with my glasses on. When I said to the people from Fantasy Island that my nickname was Jerry, I couldn't prenounce it correctly. After trying to explain it to them that it was Joey, and not Jerry, I thought why not give it a go. So my nickname there was Joey.

I worked at Fantasy Island for two summers. I had to go back to the Netherlands, because I worked here too. But I always wanted to stay there for longer, because it was sad saying goodbye to them all. Had so many good times. Even celebrating my birthday in style, in a club! Well, not a posh club like Ministry of Sound, but a local club. I raved all night, got so drunk, but I didn't care. I was enjoying myself! Let's see if I got a picture from that night:

Yes I was wasted that night, as you can see! Good times, as I can remember. Can't remember why Laura was crying. Maybe I punched her in the face, but it must have been an accident. OMG I was wasted. Unbelievable. But it was my day! It was so amazing that they kept on requesting songs, because of my birthday. It was then when I got hooked on Eric Prydz's song, Call on Me. Couldn't stop dancing to it.

I went there two years in a row, and had so much fun. The payment was good, colleagues were great. So many memories. And I think I went back in 2008, just to have a look, not to work. And a lot has changed. Sadly, not alot of members from back in the days were there. They all left. A few stayed, but most of them left.

Back in the Netherlands, I was watching Comedy Central one day, and saw a trailer for "Two Pints of Lager and a packet of crisps". I liked the humour immediately, so I thought "why not watch it?" After several shows, I went online, to look for pictures, videos etc. And then all of a sudden I found a website, where they had a forum, and it was all about the show. I became a member, and a whole new world opened for me. Met alot of new people online. It was amazing. And they came up with an idea, a barbeque. But in England. I never met them before, I was so freaked out. I would drive for hours for a bloody barbeque. Should I do it? But then I thought "Fuck it, just do it". And I did. Have a lot of good memories. Met alot of them. And that's why I have a special thing with people from the UK. They are special.

I went to the BBC two times, I think. Met new people there too! But that will be a new blog next time. Or maybe I should talk a bit more about those people. But not yet. I am bored, my fingers hurt. And my bed needs to be made. So, au revoir, as the French would say!